Well, the hours are winding down, and there's only about 8 hours left of 2010 for us Americans here... I think it's different for people in Australia, lol!!
I'm very excited to say the least... 2010 had a lot of bad things (I think I wrote about this already, or I'm having intense deja vu) but 2011 I believe will bring in nothing but positive things to my life. And of those that are negative, I'll take them with a grain of salt and throw them over my shoulder and move forward.
Because that's what you have to do.
Move forward.
Wishing you all a prosperous, happy, loving New Year... get wasted, but try to be okay for the first day of 2011!! Hahaha :)
Friday, December 31, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Bored
What to do?
Continue "War & Peace" by Leo Tolstoy?
Look for possible jobs in case my research paid internship doesn't work out?
Shove Max off the bed because he's shoving me off first?
I'm quite un-entertained at the moment
-.-
Continue "War & Peace" by Leo Tolstoy?
Look for possible jobs in case my research paid internship doesn't work out?
Shove Max off the bed because he's shoving me off first?
I'm quite un-entertained at the moment
-.-
Sunday, December 26, 2010
2010
This will probably be the last update I'll make in this blog for this year... unless of course, I get bored again and decide to write away my feelings. Har har.
:)
Anyway, I had a nice trip in Tenn. with the fam, saw snow, froze my ass off, drank some moonshine, and overall had a blast (with the exception of the usual annoyances that accompany most family gatherings). Sure, there were a few spats here and there, but it was a nice experience, especially getting to spend time with my dad. For some reason, unless he's up in the boonies, he's not in a good mood, so I take full advantage when we're not in the middle of the city to sit in silence with him.... That's connecting, in case you're not familiar with my dad's antisocial behavior, lol.
Other than that, I had a nice flight back down and enjoyed a noche buena and Christmas with my family in law and my wonderful boyfriend. I have news on that front.. he asked me to move in with him. I'm not going to lie, my stomach did turns and flipped, and my heart was about to race out of my chest at the thought of being able to go to sleep and wake up with the man I love every day. But at the same time, we both know that we shouldn't rush into something and live on a horrible budget, when we can save up a little money, wait a little more, and move in together down the road on better economic terms. The biggest problem we have right now is that I don't have a job... I quit back in August if you remember, and have been living off a loan I took out with him since then.
I have to say, I manage my finances pretty well. I still have 1k from what I got, which I should've spent by now. So hooray for me!!
But anyway, the point is, I have to see if I can get paid for my research. I applied for the position/paid internship already, and should find out around March whether I got in or not. Hopefully with my good recommendations, and the fact that I maintained my GPA this past semester despite late nights and heart attacks about failing (thank you Lord for your unwavering support), I should get the position. But there's always someone better out there, with a much higher GPA, and that is a problem. My experience and volunteering in the lab for almost a year should also work in my support though, so let's see. That would be $11 an hour to do things that I will gain experience for in my field, which would be the perfect opportunity for me. If not, my next option is beg and plead for a position somewhere on campus, no matter what the pay is. I'll just have to work more hours...
And then as a last resort, waitressing. I know it won't be fun, and I'll be back in the food industry, but at least this time I'll put up with people's bullshit and earn a little more money than I did before.
Our idea is for me to at least earn $400 that I can put towards groceries and bills, and the rest he can take care of. I know my family will be upset (and so will his) about us moving in together without being married, let alone engaged. I had the conversation with him, but what he says also resonates a note in my heart: this is about us, not them. True enough, when you marry, you marry into the family, not just to the person... but first and foremost comes the person. We've been together for over 3 years, going on 4, and I think we're ready for that next step. Besides, it would be good for us to learn to live together and work out little issues before we get married I think... I still have my morals, and I would like to be engaged at least before we move in together... I'm hoping we're heading in that direction if we're heading in the direction of moving in together already, lol.
Other than that, school starts in just 2 weeks, I'm excited for my trip to Chicago with my baby, and excited for the future overall. 2010 was a tough year for me, from radiation for my tumor, to my grandmother's surgery for her cancer, and almost failing my classes... but I got through it for the better, and I'm ready for a prosperous and new year :)
2011, bring me good things!!
:)
Hope you all have a great day.
:)
Anyway, I had a nice trip in Tenn. with the fam, saw snow, froze my ass off, drank some moonshine, and overall had a blast (with the exception of the usual annoyances that accompany most family gatherings). Sure, there were a few spats here and there, but it was a nice experience, especially getting to spend time with my dad. For some reason, unless he's up in the boonies, he's not in a good mood, so I take full advantage when we're not in the middle of the city to sit in silence with him.... That's connecting, in case you're not familiar with my dad's antisocial behavior, lol.
Other than that, I had a nice flight back down and enjoyed a noche buena and Christmas with my family in law and my wonderful boyfriend. I have news on that front.. he asked me to move in with him. I'm not going to lie, my stomach did turns and flipped, and my heart was about to race out of my chest at the thought of being able to go to sleep and wake up with the man I love every day. But at the same time, we both know that we shouldn't rush into something and live on a horrible budget, when we can save up a little money, wait a little more, and move in together down the road on better economic terms. The biggest problem we have right now is that I don't have a job... I quit back in August if you remember, and have been living off a loan I took out with him since then.
I have to say, I manage my finances pretty well. I still have 1k from what I got, which I should've spent by now. So hooray for me!!
But anyway, the point is, I have to see if I can get paid for my research. I applied for the position/paid internship already, and should find out around March whether I got in or not. Hopefully with my good recommendations, and the fact that I maintained my GPA this past semester despite late nights and heart attacks about failing (thank you Lord for your unwavering support), I should get the position. But there's always someone better out there, with a much higher GPA, and that is a problem. My experience and volunteering in the lab for almost a year should also work in my support though, so let's see. That would be $11 an hour to do things that I will gain experience for in my field, which would be the perfect opportunity for me. If not, my next option is beg and plead for a position somewhere on campus, no matter what the pay is. I'll just have to work more hours...
And then as a last resort, waitressing. I know it won't be fun, and I'll be back in the food industry, but at least this time I'll put up with people's bullshit and earn a little more money than I did before.
Our idea is for me to at least earn $400 that I can put towards groceries and bills, and the rest he can take care of. I know my family will be upset (and so will his) about us moving in together without being married, let alone engaged. I had the conversation with him, but what he says also resonates a note in my heart: this is about us, not them. True enough, when you marry, you marry into the family, not just to the person... but first and foremost comes the person. We've been together for over 3 years, going on 4, and I think we're ready for that next step. Besides, it would be good for us to learn to live together and work out little issues before we get married I think... I still have my morals, and I would like to be engaged at least before we move in together... I'm hoping we're heading in that direction if we're heading in the direction of moving in together already, lol.
Other than that, school starts in just 2 weeks, I'm excited for my trip to Chicago with my baby, and excited for the future overall. 2010 was a tough year for me, from radiation for my tumor, to my grandmother's surgery for her cancer, and almost failing my classes... but I got through it for the better, and I'm ready for a prosperous and new year :)
2011, bring me good things!!
:)
Hope you all have a great day.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Sleep
There is no better sleep than the kind you get with your spouse.
Or in my case, my boyfriend, lol.
Yep, snuck him in last night after he had been here to whole day, and he slept over until 7am that he had to head to work. Don't ask how I did it, but I feel bad deceiving my grandmother.. but man, it feels so good to sleep, all cozy and warm (especially in this cold weather) with the person you love. <3
He was here practically the whole day. Came from work with some ingredients, and me, being sick as a dog, had asked for some soup. So the wonderful person that he is worked in the kitchen after a meeting at work, and made me some home made chicken soup. Really good! I'll be lucky if I marry him... in case I can't cook, we won't be living off of McDonalds, that's for sure!!
I think our dog enjoyed sleeping with him the most though... Max is very attached to his daddy and immediately sat on him, like claiming he was his territory. He's next to me right now on the bed, looking at me and wondering if daddy is coming over tonight... unfortunately, he's not :( But the way I look at it, we'll have plenty of time to sleep with eachother in the future, so I'll have to wait my big butt until then!!
I have everything packed for my Tennessee trip tomorrow, and I'll miss my two babies very much, but I'll be back my Wednesday to my babies.
For now, I'm going to take a nap... I'm going to see Tron Legacy with my friends tonight, so hopefully that will be a good movie and I won't have wasted my time or sleep lol.
:)
Kisses from Miami.
Or in my case, my boyfriend, lol.
Yep, snuck him in last night after he had been here to whole day, and he slept over until 7am that he had to head to work. Don't ask how I did it, but I feel bad deceiving my grandmother.. but man, it feels so good to sleep, all cozy and warm (especially in this cold weather) with the person you love. <3
He was here practically the whole day. Came from work with some ingredients, and me, being sick as a dog, had asked for some soup. So the wonderful person that he is worked in the kitchen after a meeting at work, and made me some home made chicken soup. Really good! I'll be lucky if I marry him... in case I can't cook, we won't be living off of McDonalds, that's for sure!!
I think our dog enjoyed sleeping with him the most though... Max is very attached to his daddy and immediately sat on him, like claiming he was his territory. He's next to me right now on the bed, looking at me and wondering if daddy is coming over tonight... unfortunately, he's not :( But the way I look at it, we'll have plenty of time to sleep with eachother in the future, so I'll have to wait my big butt until then!!
I have everything packed for my Tennessee trip tomorrow, and I'll miss my two babies very much, but I'll be back my Wednesday to my babies.
For now, I'm going to take a nap... I'm going to see Tron Legacy with my friends tonight, so hopefully that will be a good movie and I won't have wasted my time or sleep lol.
:)
Kisses from Miami.
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Christmas Break
It has finally arrived.
And with great news: A in my Biology class and labs, and I managed a solid B in my chemistry class! :) I have yet to see what's in my Precalculus, and the verdict for my Physics (a whole fiasco of goings on there), but hopefully it will be for the better.
I've enjoyed my break so far... I've caught up on laundry, cleaned, organized a bit... I'll probably attack my closet tomorrow, and then pack for Tennessee. I leave Friday and will be back on a flight on Wends to spend Christmas with my grandmother and boyfriend.
I've also applied for quite a number of jobs, of which include some writing opportunities.. I'm looking forward to hopefully hear back form those positions, since flexibility is what I need most at the moment. I wouldn't mind writing some articles for little pay, as long as it is some form of income. I need something to supplement my loan, if not a part time job in a clerical setting... but let's see what God has in store for me. I'm desperately wanting to get back into ballet, but the financial issues are daunting.
Let's see.
For now, I'm sick, in bed, with a fever and runny nose.
But not to fear! Max is here!!
My baby <3
And with great news: A in my Biology class and labs, and I managed a solid B in my chemistry class! :) I have yet to see what's in my Precalculus, and the verdict for my Physics (a whole fiasco of goings on there), but hopefully it will be for the better.
I've enjoyed my break so far... I've caught up on laundry, cleaned, organized a bit... I'll probably attack my closet tomorrow, and then pack for Tennessee. I leave Friday and will be back on a flight on Wends to spend Christmas with my grandmother and boyfriend.
I've also applied for quite a number of jobs, of which include some writing opportunities.. I'm looking forward to hopefully hear back form those positions, since flexibility is what I need most at the moment. I wouldn't mind writing some articles for little pay, as long as it is some form of income. I need something to supplement my loan, if not a part time job in a clerical setting... but let's see what God has in store for me. I'm desperately wanting to get back into ballet, but the financial issues are daunting.
Let's see.
For now, I'm sick, in bed, with a fever and runny nose.
But not to fear! Max is here!!
My baby <3
Sunday, December 5, 2010
10 hours of chemistry in 2 days...
Can lead to some serious headaches.
But I'm managing... I've gotten through the first 4 chapters, the first exam, and have started on the second one. I'm hoping to start chapter 5 tonight before I go to bed (I'm taking a quick break right now), and then tomorrow finish chapters 5, 6, 7 and 8, and finish the second exam, start on the third... review the first and second with classmates who got different versions... compare, work out the problems, and move forward...
I still haven't touched precalculus, which I need to do asap. Mostly I just need to rework the problems that were assigned on previous exams, which I feel shouldn't be too difficult, but for some reason, that exam is always hard for me. I managed to get a C on the last one... passing... which made my very happy, considering I was struggling in that class. If I can manage a B, i'll be estatic... the class seems to be failing overall, so maybe he will curve. But I can't count on that and need to work as hard as possible to get a good grade in that exam.
Other than that, I'm just looking forward to going to ballet on Wends to de-stress before finals on Thursday, and then I am finally done with the hell of a semester!! AT LAST!! I can just sit in my bathrub, full of hot water, and read my favorite book, undisturbed with thoughts of homework, sine, cosine, titrations, strong acids, etc. etc.
:)
What a relief that will be.
Looking forward to being a lazy bum all winter break. YES!
But I'm managing... I've gotten through the first 4 chapters, the first exam, and have started on the second one. I'm hoping to start chapter 5 tonight before I go to bed (I'm taking a quick break right now), and then tomorrow finish chapters 5, 6, 7 and 8, and finish the second exam, start on the third... review the first and second with classmates who got different versions... compare, work out the problems, and move forward...
I still haven't touched precalculus, which I need to do asap. Mostly I just need to rework the problems that were assigned on previous exams, which I feel shouldn't be too difficult, but for some reason, that exam is always hard for me. I managed to get a C on the last one... passing... which made my very happy, considering I was struggling in that class. If I can manage a B, i'll be estatic... the class seems to be failing overall, so maybe he will curve. But I can't count on that and need to work as hard as possible to get a good grade in that exam.
Other than that, I'm just looking forward to going to ballet on Wends to de-stress before finals on Thursday, and then I am finally done with the hell of a semester!! AT LAST!! I can just sit in my bathrub, full of hot water, and read my favorite book, undisturbed with thoughts of homework, sine, cosine, titrations, strong acids, etc. etc.
:)
What a relief that will be.
Looking forward to being a lazy bum all winter break. YES!
Friday, December 3, 2010
:)
I woke up quite happy today... I think because I had such a wonderful day yesterday... instead of spending my entire day studying, I went to Starbucks to study in the morning (after washing and drying my dirty comforter... thank you Max!) and was studying, and then my boyfriend surprised me by showing up... He had called to see what time we were going to have lunch, and I told him where I was, and he surprised me :) So then we went to have lunch, went to his house, watched a movie, and then I went to school, found out I passed my precalc exam (thank goodness!) and then back to his house to watch the Heat Game (which we won!!). i think the fact of spending such a wonderful day together, especially when we had missed eachother's company, really helped to liven my spirits.
So to make up for lost time (although wonderfully lost as it was) I woke up early this morning, shower, and out the door to study for my bio lecture final this afternoon. I was a helper, so I have an additional 2 points already, and i don't think I did bad on the exam. I'll say it was the hardest one yet, but as long as I get a B, I'm good for the class. I get an A :)
Now to just finish chemistry extra credit assignments before 6pm... I have an hour and a half to do a couple of questions only, and then cook, finish laundry, and pick up a bit, and I think I'm off to bed. I'm mentally exhausted and need a break... tomorrow starts another day... unfortunately can't be a normal Saturday lol. But on the bright side, I get to go to ballet from 1 to 2:30, and then 3 to 10pm studying in the library at school. I bet it's going to be hella full too, so that'll be fun.
Anyway, let me hop to my assignment. :)
Hope you're having an awesomely blasphemous day... LOL!
So to make up for lost time (although wonderfully lost as it was) I woke up early this morning, shower, and out the door to study for my bio lecture final this afternoon. I was a helper, so I have an additional 2 points already, and i don't think I did bad on the exam. I'll say it was the hardest one yet, but as long as I get a B, I'm good for the class. I get an A :)
Now to just finish chemistry extra credit assignments before 6pm... I have an hour and a half to do a couple of questions only, and then cook, finish laundry, and pick up a bit, and I think I'm off to bed. I'm mentally exhausted and need a break... tomorrow starts another day... unfortunately can't be a normal Saturday lol. But on the bright side, I get to go to ballet from 1 to 2:30, and then 3 to 10pm studying in the library at school. I bet it's going to be hella full too, so that'll be fun.
Anyway, let me hop to my assignment. :)
Hope you're having an awesomely blasphemous day... LOL!
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Final Stretch
This semester from hell is almost over...
I'm studying for biology now, which should be another easy A, and that lecture is secured with an A. My labs are also secured with A's. The only thing I have left to really worry about is my chemistry and precalculus finals next Thursday... a week to study for that stuff. Let's hope it does the trick to be with a bunch of friends studying, and to take everyone's tests and mix them together in order to study more efficiently.
I was supposed to go to ballet class today, but once again, financial woes keep me from doing what I love :/ I'm here at my boyfriend's house now, studying for biology and doing the last chapters that I need to complete today, so that tomorrow is all about chemistry extra credit, and reviewing everything for bio before Friday's class... even though I have a nice gap between my PLTL session and my lecture since I no longer have physics lab inbetween :) So if I don't get to reviewing too much tomorrow, that'll be okay.
I'm looking forward to Saturday, as I will definitely be taking my ballet class there. I'm staring at my pointe shoes right now and hoping and praying that by next year, I will be able to wear them and dance beautifully... maybe a nice little in studio production. I always seem to get close to my goal and something else gets in my way, but I would like to dedicate myself this upcoming year. I think I will make that my goal for the year.
Anywho, my little mini break is over, and I should get back to my bio chapters.
On a positive note, the HEAT are winning :)!!!
Love <3
I'm studying for biology now, which should be another easy A, and that lecture is secured with an A. My labs are also secured with A's. The only thing I have left to really worry about is my chemistry and precalculus finals next Thursday... a week to study for that stuff. Let's hope it does the trick to be with a bunch of friends studying, and to take everyone's tests and mix them together in order to study more efficiently.
I was supposed to go to ballet class today, but once again, financial woes keep me from doing what I love :/ I'm here at my boyfriend's house now, studying for biology and doing the last chapters that I need to complete today, so that tomorrow is all about chemistry extra credit, and reviewing everything for bio before Friday's class... even though I have a nice gap between my PLTL session and my lecture since I no longer have physics lab inbetween :) So if I don't get to reviewing too much tomorrow, that'll be okay.
I'm looking forward to Saturday, as I will definitely be taking my ballet class there. I'm staring at my pointe shoes right now and hoping and praying that by next year, I will be able to wear them and dance beautifully... maybe a nice little in studio production. I always seem to get close to my goal and something else gets in my way, but I would like to dedicate myself this upcoming year. I think I will make that my goal for the year.
Anywho, my little mini break is over, and I should get back to my bio chapters.
On a positive note, the HEAT are winning :)!!!
Love <3
Saturday, November 27, 2010
La La La
It feels so nice to just sit in bed and not have a worry in the world.
Even though I still have finals to go.
But it still feels nice :)
I believe today's agenda includes finishing my bio lab report and studying for that lab midterm, and also starting on reviewing the chapters for the upcoming exam on Friday for that class. I have to watch a movie at some point... I think today is bio day, lol. Probably tomorrow I'll study for my chem lab final on wends, and start a review guide for that class, as well as finish up some stuff for bio that I don't get to today.
Last night was a very fun time with the boyfriend and family :) And then just with the boyfriend ;) Lol. I think tonight we're going out with a couple friend of ours that we haven't seen in a while...
I guess I should get my lazy bum out of bed, go eat something, and try to finish this report by 12. If I finish it before then, I'm going to give myself a reward in the form of a soy chai :) Yum!
Hope you're having a great today out there :)
Oh yes, forgot to add, I start ballet classes once again next week! So excited :)
Even though I still have finals to go.
But it still feels nice :)
I believe today's agenda includes finishing my bio lab report and studying for that lab midterm, and also starting on reviewing the chapters for the upcoming exam on Friday for that class. I have to watch a movie at some point... I think today is bio day, lol. Probably tomorrow I'll study for my chem lab final on wends, and start a review guide for that class, as well as finish up some stuff for bio that I don't get to today.
Last night was a very fun time with the boyfriend and family :) And then just with the boyfriend ;) Lol. I think tonight we're going out with a couple friend of ours that we haven't seen in a while...
I guess I should get my lazy bum out of bed, go eat something, and try to finish this report by 12. If I finish it before then, I'm going to give myself a reward in the form of a soy chai :) Yum!
Hope you're having a great today out there :)
Oh yes, forgot to add, I start ballet classes once again next week! So excited :)
Monday, November 22, 2010
Stressed
But then again, it's the end of the semester, so why shouldn't I be?
Just finished a quiz for bio, all of my homework for my respective classes, and did a practice test for my chemistry exam tomorrow, of which I got 7/13 right.... not good, not good at all. I need to up that score by a LOT, so that means tonight, I'm not sleeping one bit.
On a brighter note, I've decided to go to open classes of ballet for adults... it's a little far, but it's going to make me happy and put a spring in my step (literally), so I'm very excited to start. I think if they're open this Saturday, I'll be taking their class :) Not sure where I'll park, since it's a small parking lot, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.
Well, I should head off to school. Last chem class before the final.
Hope you're having a great day wherever you are!!
<3
Just finished a quiz for bio, all of my homework for my respective classes, and did a practice test for my chemistry exam tomorrow, of which I got 7/13 right.... not good, not good at all. I need to up that score by a LOT, so that means tonight, I'm not sleeping one bit.
On a brighter note, I've decided to go to open classes of ballet for adults... it's a little far, but it's going to make me happy and put a spring in my step (literally), so I'm very excited to start. I think if they're open this Saturday, I'll be taking their class :) Not sure where I'll park, since it's a small parking lot, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.
Well, I should head off to school. Last chem class before the final.
Hope you're having a great day wherever you are!!
<3
Saturday, November 20, 2010
End of the Semester
Finally! It has almost arrived! 3 weeks left until the hell of a fall 2010 is over... and about 4 exams before that can happen.
Oh joy.
-.-
Next week I'm knocking 2 of them out of the ball park in one night... precalc, and then chemistry. They are my last exams before finals, and hopefully, I am praying, that I do well on all of my finals to rescue bad midterm grades... we'll see. I'm diving head long into studying for these exams, so hopefully everything returns my efforts.
I'm currently at Starbucks, my old store, studying, and I probably shouldn't procrastinate anymore. I want to get going by 3pm so I can hit the gym today :)
Hope everything is going well for you wherever you are!
Oh joy.
-.-
Next week I'm knocking 2 of them out of the ball park in one night... precalc, and then chemistry. They are my last exams before finals, and hopefully, I am praying, that I do well on all of my finals to rescue bad midterm grades... we'll see. I'm diving head long into studying for these exams, so hopefully everything returns my efforts.
I'm currently at Starbucks, my old store, studying, and I probably shouldn't procrastinate anymore. I want to get going by 3pm so I can hit the gym today :)
Hope everything is going well for you wherever you are!
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Reality
It bites, doesn't it?
I'm back from a wonderful and spontaneous vacation in Disney with my most amazing friends who paid for my trip up there :) It was nice to just relax (although standing in line for hours and walking endlessly doesn't count as relaxing) and laugh for the day, enjoying the good weather and being a kid again. I'm very excited because they're opening a Little Mermaid attraction since the last time I was there, and that's my favorite disney movie, so I want to go back sometime by next summer in order to enjoy that addition. I really also want to go see Harry Potter world as well... let's see if I can convince my boyfriend to take me on a trip up there one of these coming months while it's still cold so we can enjoy that and the rollercoasters at Islands of Adventure and Universal Studios :)
Other than that, I'm back home and doing homework like crazy. I've been slacking off a lot... just reading and catching up, and fulfilling my homeworks on time, but kind of pushing physics and pre-calculus out of the way. Unfortunately I can't do that any longer (well, I can, I still have another week left to do it, but I'm not allowing myself to have that time) and have to get it all done today. So far, so good. I got my physics homework done with the exception of one problem on there, and I understood most of it, which is key. Precalculus is next... I was supposed to do it at my best friend's house when I slept over Friday in prep for Disney, but you know that never happens when you're with friends, lol.
Anywho, I'm going out for some soy chai from my old job place as a pick me up and reward for doing physics, and before I hunker down to complete math. -.- The joys of school... at least only a few weeks left until finals and the end of the semester!! I sign up for spring classes tomorrow (which I'm giving myself an easy semester), and I've applied for tutoring jobs as well... and in 2 weeks, I take my finals, and I'll be done with this nightmare of a semester!!
Well, let me get going. Have to round up the baby (my dog) and my mom to go pick up the coffee.
Hope you're doing well wherever you are!!
I'm back from a wonderful and spontaneous vacation in Disney with my most amazing friends who paid for my trip up there :) It was nice to just relax (although standing in line for hours and walking endlessly doesn't count as relaxing) and laugh for the day, enjoying the good weather and being a kid again. I'm very excited because they're opening a Little Mermaid attraction since the last time I was there, and that's my favorite disney movie, so I want to go back sometime by next summer in order to enjoy that addition. I really also want to go see Harry Potter world as well... let's see if I can convince my boyfriend to take me on a trip up there one of these coming months while it's still cold so we can enjoy that and the rollercoasters at Islands of Adventure and Universal Studios :)
Other than that, I'm back home and doing homework like crazy. I've been slacking off a lot... just reading and catching up, and fulfilling my homeworks on time, but kind of pushing physics and pre-calculus out of the way. Unfortunately I can't do that any longer (well, I can, I still have another week left to do it, but I'm not allowing myself to have that time) and have to get it all done today. So far, so good. I got my physics homework done with the exception of one problem on there, and I understood most of it, which is key. Precalculus is next... I was supposed to do it at my best friend's house when I slept over Friday in prep for Disney, but you know that never happens when you're with friends, lol.
Anywho, I'm going out for some soy chai from my old job place as a pick me up and reward for doing physics, and before I hunker down to complete math. -.- The joys of school... at least only a few weeks left until finals and the end of the semester!! I sign up for spring classes tomorrow (which I'm giving myself an easy semester), and I've applied for tutoring jobs as well... and in 2 weeks, I take my finals, and I'll be done with this nightmare of a semester!!
Well, let me get going. Have to round up the baby (my dog) and my mom to go pick up the coffee.
Hope you're doing well wherever you are!!
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Sleep is awesome.
& also the best remedy... I have never felt so rejuvenated in my life. I'd slept a total of 8 hours in 2 days, so last night, after a very long day again, I got home and took a shower, and headed straight for bed at 6pm... woke up a couple of times inbetween (family screaming, dog begging to be played with, boyfriend calling), but overall slept straight until 9am this morning... so good... SO GOOD!! :)
Anywho, I don't think I've updated this in a while. I'm in a much better mood than I was the last time I updated I believe... can't remember. The synopsis of the last week or so is a lot of work... that's about it, lol. Between reading for class and finally catching up with my workload, and doing some fundraising for the non-profit organization that goes to Haiti for my friend Carlos, I've been exhausted. But everything has been very successful... the first day we made over $200, and yesterday we made $120, just dancing like idiots... I decided to hold up a sign that said "WILL DANCE 4 DONATIONS" and it got plenty of attention..
As far as school goes, I failed my physics exam horribly, but I'm finding that I just don't care at the moment. My professor got a 60 on that exam. his OWN exam, so he's giving us a study guide to complete and adding 15 points to our exam... which, by the way, still comes out to an F for me (a D- by one point). I'm still acing my biology lecture, and all my labs, and I feel like I'm pulling my Chemistry exam up out of a C to a B.. hopefully it'll happen by the end of this semester, which is only in 3 weeks.
3 WEEKS!!
Thank God. I don't think i could take any more of this torture.
My friends actually surprised me with a trip to Disney this Saturday, so I'm very excited :) My boyfriend left to washington, d.c. for the weekend... envious is the least to describe what I'm feeling at the moment. I wanted to go there for our next trip together, but he had everything paid for him by his old high school if he chaperoned, so he took the oppurtunity :( Good for him I guess, but I wish I could have gone.
Anyway, I better get chopping. My best friend is picking me up in 2 hours time to go shopping (for 2 sweaters 'cause I can't afford anything else :/) and then I've got a ton of homework and studying to do.
Happy Veteran's Day, and thank you to all those soldiers out there who risk their lives without a second thought. Wish you were home, safe and sound. <3
Anywho, I don't think I've updated this in a while. I'm in a much better mood than I was the last time I updated I believe... can't remember. The synopsis of the last week or so is a lot of work... that's about it, lol. Between reading for class and finally catching up with my workload, and doing some fundraising for the non-profit organization that goes to Haiti for my friend Carlos, I've been exhausted. But everything has been very successful... the first day we made over $200, and yesterday we made $120, just dancing like idiots... I decided to hold up a sign that said "WILL DANCE 4 DONATIONS" and it got plenty of attention..
As far as school goes, I failed my physics exam horribly, but I'm finding that I just don't care at the moment. My professor got a 60 on that exam. his OWN exam, so he's giving us a study guide to complete and adding 15 points to our exam... which, by the way, still comes out to an F for me (a D- by one point). I'm still acing my biology lecture, and all my labs, and I feel like I'm pulling my Chemistry exam up out of a C to a B.. hopefully it'll happen by the end of this semester, which is only in 3 weeks.
3 WEEKS!!
Thank God. I don't think i could take any more of this torture.
My friends actually surprised me with a trip to Disney this Saturday, so I'm very excited :) My boyfriend left to washington, d.c. for the weekend... envious is the least to describe what I'm feeling at the moment. I wanted to go there for our next trip together, but he had everything paid for him by his old high school if he chaperoned, so he took the oppurtunity :( Good for him I guess, but I wish I could have gone.
Anyway, I better get chopping. My best friend is picking me up in 2 hours time to go shopping (for 2 sweaters 'cause I can't afford anything else :/) and then I've got a ton of homework and studying to do.
Happy Veteran's Day, and thank you to all those soldiers out there who risk their lives without a second thought. Wish you were home, safe and sound. <3
Friday, November 5, 2010
Finally!
Winter has arrived in Miami! Hooray for 60 degree weather, a couple of months too late!!
Of course, Miami never REALLY gets cold... except around January of this year, when winter really took over and we dropped down to the 30's... weirdest sensation ever. Very happy to be cold, but at the same time, we're such hot-blooded human beings down here we were covered from head to toe, and only our eyes showed from underneath our scarfs from how freezing we were. Hopefully it won't get SO bad this year, but I'm loving the cool weather so far :)
As for everything else, well... things are just about as usual as they are. Still complaining about school, still complaining about the parents, a slight complaint about the boyfriend here and there... ah, but what's new? I've come to accept that life will always have its ups and downs, and its learning to not let the downs keep you from reaching an new height. So I take everything with a grain salt, including my bad moments, and move forward. Otherwise, what else can you do with yourself if you're stuck in the past?
So I'm finishing up some bio review for myself right now, and then I'm heading out to have some wine with a couple of friends, discuss the Haiti event that we will be launching next week, and then it's off to bed for me probably since tomorrow is my sisters engagement party and I must be in tip top shape (that means helping around the house and setting up 20 hours too early because my mother is paranoid like that). The guests aren't supposed to arrive until 7pm, and she wants to start setting up by 11am... I'm telling you, something is wrong in the head for her.
Well, hope you're doing well wherever you are, and enjoying your life. Because if you don't, who will?
:)
<3
Of course, Miami never REALLY gets cold... except around January of this year, when winter really took over and we dropped down to the 30's... weirdest sensation ever. Very happy to be cold, but at the same time, we're such hot-blooded human beings down here we were covered from head to toe, and only our eyes showed from underneath our scarfs from how freezing we were. Hopefully it won't get SO bad this year, but I'm loving the cool weather so far :)
As for everything else, well... things are just about as usual as they are. Still complaining about school, still complaining about the parents, a slight complaint about the boyfriend here and there... ah, but what's new? I've come to accept that life will always have its ups and downs, and its learning to not let the downs keep you from reaching an new height. So I take everything with a grain salt, including my bad moments, and move forward. Otherwise, what else can you do with yourself if you're stuck in the past?
So I'm finishing up some bio review for myself right now, and then I'm heading out to have some wine with a couple of friends, discuss the Haiti event that we will be launching next week, and then it's off to bed for me probably since tomorrow is my sisters engagement party and I must be in tip top shape (that means helping around the house and setting up 20 hours too early because my mother is paranoid like that). The guests aren't supposed to arrive until 7pm, and she wants to start setting up by 11am... I'm telling you, something is wrong in the head for her.
Well, hope you're doing well wherever you are, and enjoying your life. Because if you don't, who will?
:)
<3
Monday, November 1, 2010
Bombed.
That would be the title I'm giving this past physics exams I just took 10 minutes ago.
Completely. Bombed.
Down the drain.
Zip right.
Zero.
I'll be surprised if I got 10 points out of that thing. Maybe even 20.
That was the worst I've ever done on any exam. Completely clueless on that thing.
But you know what, I can work hard for my final and maybe even get an A, and if I do, God so help me I will get down on my knees and kiss the ground to thank the almighty, because it will have been a miracle.
I'm going to start studying for my finals as of tomorrow.
Time to set a schedule and get down to business.
Mission Finals has started.
Completely. Bombed.
Down the drain.
Zip right.
Zero.
I'll be surprised if I got 10 points out of that thing. Maybe even 20.
That was the worst I've ever done on any exam. Completely clueless on that thing.
But you know what, I can work hard for my final and maybe even get an A, and if I do, God so help me I will get down on my knees and kiss the ground to thank the almighty, because it will have been a miracle.
I'm going to start studying for my finals as of tomorrow.
Time to set a schedule and get down to business.
Mission Finals has started.
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Chicharritas
They are so yummy. You gotta be latin to love such fattening foods lol.
I ended up going out last night to my best friend's halloween party... it was tons of fun. I pulled something out of my closet and called myself the modern latin marilyn monroe, for lack of a better term lol. It was a bit short, but ah well. Halloween is the right to where whatever you'd like without being criticized, so who cares. I'd attatch a picture (it really wasn't that bad, just a little short) but I'm too lazy to look it up in my computer right now. It boosted my self confidence a little though... my legs looked amazing :)
I'm studying right now for physics, which I honestly feel like I have no hope for, and therefore, I'm not going to sweat it. I managed to get through a couple of problems, and I understand concepts, so I'm shooting for that C again in this exam... with hardly any studying and not understanding how to work out problems in most of the chapters... but you know what, that's my fault for 1. picking way too many hard classes this semester and 2. for falling behind and not attending class in order to study for my other exams.
So what's the plan for finals week then?
I'm going to start studying as of now. I have a month, and I can take it easy instead of cramming all over the place and feeling pressured to do everything. That way I can actually study for physics, maybe even pull off a B in the final, and end that class with a nice C average, which is passing and all I'm praying for. I should be ending Bio lecture with an A, as well as all of my labs (chem, bio and physics), and hopefully a B in pre-calc and in chemistry as well.
Let me tell you, those grades such ass according to my potential scale, but they're the best I could manage this semester with research going on and various other activities, and not forgetting me time, family time, and boyfriend time.
So I'm going to pat myself on the back for full effort and decent grades, and for not failing any of my classes, and be happy and go on my way for next semester... looking forward to a MUCH better semester really. Bio 2, Chem 2 (as my hardest class), Stats 1, and Advanced Spanish... of course, with all the labs... yep, I'm looking forward to spring :) I thought about adding a parisitology class in there, but I think I'm just going to take it easy.
Have a Happy Halloween wherever you are!!
<3
I ended up going out last night to my best friend's halloween party... it was tons of fun. I pulled something out of my closet and called myself the modern latin marilyn monroe, for lack of a better term lol. It was a bit short, but ah well. Halloween is the right to where whatever you'd like without being criticized, so who cares. I'd attatch a picture (it really wasn't that bad, just a little short) but I'm too lazy to look it up in my computer right now. It boosted my self confidence a little though... my legs looked amazing :)
I'm studying right now for physics, which I honestly feel like I have no hope for, and therefore, I'm not going to sweat it. I managed to get through a couple of problems, and I understand concepts, so I'm shooting for that C again in this exam... with hardly any studying and not understanding how to work out problems in most of the chapters... but you know what, that's my fault for 1. picking way too many hard classes this semester and 2. for falling behind and not attending class in order to study for my other exams.
So what's the plan for finals week then?
I'm going to start studying as of now. I have a month, and I can take it easy instead of cramming all over the place and feeling pressured to do everything. That way I can actually study for physics, maybe even pull off a B in the final, and end that class with a nice C average, which is passing and all I'm praying for. I should be ending Bio lecture with an A, as well as all of my labs (chem, bio and physics), and hopefully a B in pre-calc and in chemistry as well.
Let me tell you, those grades such ass according to my potential scale, but they're the best I could manage this semester with research going on and various other activities, and not forgetting me time, family time, and boyfriend time.
So I'm going to pat myself on the back for full effort and decent grades, and for not failing any of my classes, and be happy and go on my way for next semester... looking forward to a MUCH better semester really. Bio 2, Chem 2 (as my hardest class), Stats 1, and Advanced Spanish... of course, with all the labs... yep, I'm looking forward to spring :) I thought about adding a parisitology class in there, but I think I'm just going to take it easy.
Have a Happy Halloween wherever you are!!
<3
Friday, October 29, 2010
As usual...
I come onto my blog to complain. I wonder how some of you might see this blog as you pass by... probably be like "WTF is she thinking? She's paranoid all the time about the smallest things... people are dying out there in war and famine, and she's worried about the next grade she'll get in her chemistry class..."
And above all, I agree. I shouldn't be stressing out so much over petty things in life, but unfortunately in the United States, your education determines who you are... no education means you're crap, and high education means you either had money, or worked your ass to get there... and if you do have high education, you're either a failure at it (bad GPA), or a success (good GPA), and if you're good, then they look at your background and history, and if that's clear....
Get my point? The evaluation goes on.
So I'm doing my best to help at least one life out there by promoting this Haiti event... it shoots off in 2 weeks, so I'm very excited. I don't have exams that week, which I'm so very thankful for, so I'm in the clear... in fact, I'm almost halfway through the semester now, thank the Lord.
But I'm still upset. I'm upset that i try my best and bust my butt studying every day (because not a SINGLE DAY goes by that I don't spend 2 hours doing some kind of assignment or studying), and that I manage to at least ace all of my exams in one of my lecture courses (Biology of course, which I love), and I run to tell my mom...
Lo and behold, she questions me about which exam it was, then asks me if thats the reason I've been staying up late or at the library, and the reason she never sees me, and then asks me what was the average, and then says "Oh, an 88... that's a B... that's good"...
...
That 88 was one of the highest scores in my class... it was on the most difficult chapters, dealing with gene expression, genetics and chromosomal inheritance.... and yet, it's "good". I wish she would, for once, not question me and degrade me, and just saying "CONGRATULATIONS, IM SO PROUD OF YOU!".
And then I still my boyfriend, and he doesn't even bother to say congrats, he says "aww". Who the hell says aww to a good grade?
I'm just so frustrated :( I feel like whatever I do to make others happy about me, like my family, never works out... they always want more, and more, and more...
And then I got a into a fight with my boyfriend about something that still bothers me after 2 years, and I can understand his frustration... because it stems from my insecurity and my untrust-yness. I can understand it. And I also understand myself: I don't trust because my family has continually let me down in a lot of things in my life, plus some other things that have happened... but it just bothers me. So I've been trying to communicate to him, the best way I can, and let it out so I don't get upset about it in the long run, but that never works out, and he just... got extremely mad. Not the way I wanted to start off a week, especially when I hadn't seen him in a week and we had been doing so well... he was sending me goodmorning texts every day, calling me princess, and just overall doing cute things for me...
But nope, either I screw it up as always, or something just wasn't good enough.
So I understand what happened. I apologized. I learned to keep all of my shit to myself, and I'm trying to show him that I'm moving forward from the idiotness of the situation, and I'm going to his house to make dinner tonight, and I just feel like he has completely shut me down. He doesn't text me, it takes ME to contact him first for him to talk to me at all. And if I do text him, sometimes he just doesn't respond, or responds with one word. So I'm going over there tonight to cook dinner, and he just isn't enthusiastic at all.
It's like, on my families side, I try my best to impress and to live up to their expectations, and I get shut down immediately.
Then I try to reconcile differences with my boyfriend, and I'm completely shut down there too.
I don't know what else to do... and I know the advice that everyone will give me: stop doing it for others, start doing it for yourself. And let me tell you something, I made that my motto not too long and it worked for a couple of weeks, but it's just the PERSON THAT I AM. I always want to make someone else happy... I always put the needs of others before myself.. and I always end up dissapointed, because I can never live up to what other people think I should be.
I'm just depressed. I think this semester has made it horrible, and then situations at home, and now my relationship, which has been my strong hold for the last couple of months, is crumbling at the edges and I'm panicking because if I don't have anything left, I don't know what i'm going to do with myself.
I need support in my life. I'm human. I need love, and care, and everything else that makes you happy.
I need God.
And above all, I agree. I shouldn't be stressing out so much over petty things in life, but unfortunately in the United States, your education determines who you are... no education means you're crap, and high education means you either had money, or worked your ass to get there... and if you do have high education, you're either a failure at it (bad GPA), or a success (good GPA), and if you're good, then they look at your background and history, and if that's clear....
Get my point? The evaluation goes on.
So I'm doing my best to help at least one life out there by promoting this Haiti event... it shoots off in 2 weeks, so I'm very excited. I don't have exams that week, which I'm so very thankful for, so I'm in the clear... in fact, I'm almost halfway through the semester now, thank the Lord.
But I'm still upset. I'm upset that i try my best and bust my butt studying every day (because not a SINGLE DAY goes by that I don't spend 2 hours doing some kind of assignment or studying), and that I manage to at least ace all of my exams in one of my lecture courses (Biology of course, which I love), and I run to tell my mom...
Lo and behold, she questions me about which exam it was, then asks me if thats the reason I've been staying up late or at the library, and the reason she never sees me, and then asks me what was the average, and then says "Oh, an 88... that's a B... that's good"...
...
That 88 was one of the highest scores in my class... it was on the most difficult chapters, dealing with gene expression, genetics and chromosomal inheritance.... and yet, it's "good". I wish she would, for once, not question me and degrade me, and just saying "CONGRATULATIONS, IM SO PROUD OF YOU!".
And then I still my boyfriend, and he doesn't even bother to say congrats, he says "aww". Who the hell says aww to a good grade?
I'm just so frustrated :( I feel like whatever I do to make others happy about me, like my family, never works out... they always want more, and more, and more...
And then I got a into a fight with my boyfriend about something that still bothers me after 2 years, and I can understand his frustration... because it stems from my insecurity and my untrust-yness. I can understand it. And I also understand myself: I don't trust because my family has continually let me down in a lot of things in my life, plus some other things that have happened... but it just bothers me. So I've been trying to communicate to him, the best way I can, and let it out so I don't get upset about it in the long run, but that never works out, and he just... got extremely mad. Not the way I wanted to start off a week, especially when I hadn't seen him in a week and we had been doing so well... he was sending me goodmorning texts every day, calling me princess, and just overall doing cute things for me...
But nope, either I screw it up as always, or something just wasn't good enough.
So I understand what happened. I apologized. I learned to keep all of my shit to myself, and I'm trying to show him that I'm moving forward from the idiotness of the situation, and I'm going to his house to make dinner tonight, and I just feel like he has completely shut me down. He doesn't text me, it takes ME to contact him first for him to talk to me at all. And if I do text him, sometimes he just doesn't respond, or responds with one word. So I'm going over there tonight to cook dinner, and he just isn't enthusiastic at all.
It's like, on my families side, I try my best to impress and to live up to their expectations, and I get shut down immediately.
Then I try to reconcile differences with my boyfriend, and I'm completely shut down there too.
I don't know what else to do... and I know the advice that everyone will give me: stop doing it for others, start doing it for yourself. And let me tell you something, I made that my motto not too long and it worked for a couple of weeks, but it's just the PERSON THAT I AM. I always want to make someone else happy... I always put the needs of others before myself.. and I always end up dissapointed, because I can never live up to what other people think I should be.
I'm just depressed. I think this semester has made it horrible, and then situations at home, and now my relationship, which has been my strong hold for the last couple of months, is crumbling at the edges and I'm panicking because if I don't have anything left, I don't know what i'm going to do with myself.
I need support in my life. I'm human. I need love, and care, and everything else that makes you happy.
I need God.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Gym & Math
Doesn't sound like they match, do they? It's 'cause they don't...
I'm really worried about this precalculus exam. I need to do well, so that the extra credit quiz we take can count towards the exam that I got an F in :( and raise my exam grade to a B. 'Cause I raised my last exam (a C) to a B with the extra credit quiz, so if I raise it again to an A, and I get a high B on this exam, it'll offset that horrible F into a high B, plus my homework will push it up to an A (the homework weighs like one exam grade, thank goodness). Then I just have to worry about my final exam, hopefully pull off minimum a C+, and I'll be in the clear.
Incredible how it's almost the end of the semester already... I feel like it can't come soon enough. I took way too many difficult classes in one semester and have felt so stressed... next semester, I am definitely taking it much easier. Bio 2, Chem 2 (as my hardest class), Stats 1, and Spanish online. I need to raise my GPA and feel a little better about myself, and that way i can also focus on the research I'll be doing in the lab with Dr. Weeks and really hit it off there. Experience is counting more and more every day instead of a degree, so I have to make sure that if I'm not going to graduate with a very high GPA, I graduate with a decent one and lots of experience.
Besides that, I've decided to go back to the gym... I let myself go a little too much since the semester began (of course, all the stress made me head straight for the fattening food), so I'm eating healthy again, and this time, going to the gym as well.... I tend to eat healthy and do nothing else for myself lol, except maybe take the stairs depending on where I park. So let's hope I get into shape and feel better about myself. It was really nice yesterday, after I got out of the gym... I was pumped full of energy and I felt like I could conquer anything (and even got my bio quiz and chem labs done to boot!). So it should improve my self-esteem and help me do better in school.
Anyway, I should get going. I was going to go to a class, but I think what I'll do is go early to the gym and then head to my class to study and do homework before my exam review. The exam is on Thursday, so I have to chip chop on the homework!!
Wish me luck!! :(
And wish the HEAT luck today in their first season game!! TOTALLY watching that! :)
I'm really worried about this precalculus exam. I need to do well, so that the extra credit quiz we take can count towards the exam that I got an F in :( and raise my exam grade to a B. 'Cause I raised my last exam (a C) to a B with the extra credit quiz, so if I raise it again to an A, and I get a high B on this exam, it'll offset that horrible F into a high B, plus my homework will push it up to an A (the homework weighs like one exam grade, thank goodness). Then I just have to worry about my final exam, hopefully pull off minimum a C+, and I'll be in the clear.
Incredible how it's almost the end of the semester already... I feel like it can't come soon enough. I took way too many difficult classes in one semester and have felt so stressed... next semester, I am definitely taking it much easier. Bio 2, Chem 2 (as my hardest class), Stats 1, and Spanish online. I need to raise my GPA and feel a little better about myself, and that way i can also focus on the research I'll be doing in the lab with Dr. Weeks and really hit it off there. Experience is counting more and more every day instead of a degree, so I have to make sure that if I'm not going to graduate with a very high GPA, I graduate with a decent one and lots of experience.
Besides that, I've decided to go back to the gym... I let myself go a little too much since the semester began (of course, all the stress made me head straight for the fattening food), so I'm eating healthy again, and this time, going to the gym as well.... I tend to eat healthy and do nothing else for myself lol, except maybe take the stairs depending on where I park. So let's hope I get into shape and feel better about myself. It was really nice yesterday, after I got out of the gym... I was pumped full of energy and I felt like I could conquer anything (and even got my bio quiz and chem labs done to boot!). So it should improve my self-esteem and help me do better in school.
Anyway, I should get going. I was going to go to a class, but I think what I'll do is go early to the gym and then head to my class to study and do homework before my exam review. The exam is on Thursday, so I have to chip chop on the homework!!
Wish me luck!! :(
And wish the HEAT luck today in their first season game!! TOTALLY watching that! :)
Monday, October 25, 2010
Always Monday.. -.-
Ah well, it's finally exam day. I feel like I'm pretty prepared, considering I spent all weekend studying. I'm looking forward to a solid A in this exam, just like the last one. I mean, it's Bio... not to get cocky, but I'm pretty awesome at the subject.
I just finished bio lab now, the elementary style class... I think that my TA is finally getting the picture that she can't baby us and we can do things on our own... well, most of us. There are some freshman in the class that don't know how to follow instructions, but they have to shape up quickly if they want to survive college. My first semester included microbiology, where you read the instructions and do the experiment yourself, and if you do it wrong, that's your problem. Shouldn't followed the instructions.
After that, I need to do my bio quiz that's due tomorrow, just to get it out of the way, and I want to try and do some extra credit work for mastering chemistry. It's been extended to the end of the semester, and he reopened most of the other assignments, but I know if I don't keep on top of it, I'll fall behind, and December will roll around (just about a month away!) and I'll be scrambling to finish it all. So, gotta get on that.
Other than that, just physics class and chem class to go, and I need to work out... after chem, I'm gonna head to the gym for the treadmill for 15 minutes and then some kind of stair stepper for 15 minutes, and I'll be done with my half hour workout per day. And if I can't make it to the gym, I'll run for 15 minutes around the campus and climb the stairs of the garage twice... but I don't want to do that by myself, at night, so the gym is the only real option for me.
Blah... I forgot about my precalc homework as well, although that has to wait until tonight or tomorrow... I honestly think I'm going to vegetate tonight, maybe make some notecards for precalc, but nothing too crazy.
We'll see... I tend to have things pile up on me. Maybe I'll work on fixing my bio lab report so I can get that out of the way and not have to worry about it over the weekend.
So list for tonight:
-bio quiz
-bio lab report
-some chem extra credit
Yeah... and tomorrow, I'll do my precalc homework.
Sounds good.
Okay, gotta run. I need to go get a table to set up for my haiti drive in November here at school.
<3
Have a good day!!
I just finished bio lab now, the elementary style class... I think that my TA is finally getting the picture that she can't baby us and we can do things on our own... well, most of us. There are some freshman in the class that don't know how to follow instructions, but they have to shape up quickly if they want to survive college. My first semester included microbiology, where you read the instructions and do the experiment yourself, and if you do it wrong, that's your problem. Shouldn't followed the instructions.
After that, I need to do my bio quiz that's due tomorrow, just to get it out of the way, and I want to try and do some extra credit work for mastering chemistry. It's been extended to the end of the semester, and he reopened most of the other assignments, but I know if I don't keep on top of it, I'll fall behind, and December will roll around (just about a month away!) and I'll be scrambling to finish it all. So, gotta get on that.
Other than that, just physics class and chem class to go, and I need to work out... after chem, I'm gonna head to the gym for the treadmill for 15 minutes and then some kind of stair stepper for 15 minutes, and I'll be done with my half hour workout per day. And if I can't make it to the gym, I'll run for 15 minutes around the campus and climb the stairs of the garage twice... but I don't want to do that by myself, at night, so the gym is the only real option for me.
Blah... I forgot about my precalc homework as well, although that has to wait until tonight or tomorrow... I honestly think I'm going to vegetate tonight, maybe make some notecards for precalc, but nothing too crazy.
We'll see... I tend to have things pile up on me. Maybe I'll work on fixing my bio lab report so I can get that out of the way and not have to worry about it over the weekend.
So list for tonight:
-bio quiz
-bio lab report
-some chem extra credit
Yeah... and tomorrow, I'll do my precalc homework.
Sounds good.
Okay, gotta run. I need to go get a table to set up for my haiti drive in November here at school.
<3
Have a good day!!
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Don't know anymore?
This day has been so long... and it's just a Saturday. Supposedly a care-free Saturday that I do nothing but lay around, maybe do a load of laundry...
Well, I'm having issues once again with my grandmother and her lies. She told my mom she hadn't gone to the bathroom in 3 days, so my mom confronted her about it and my grandma said it'd because she stopped taking her pills. My mom got upset and told me to talk to her, and when I did, she said that she did stop taking the pills, but she'd gone to the bathroom yesterday and today. My whole problem with this is that I don't know if she's lying or not. She could be telling me that just so I don't worry, or my mom doesn't worry, and in reality she HASN'T gone to the bathroom, meaning she might have cancer again, or she's telling the truth and there isn't any to worry about.
The only thing I can do is monitor her for the next day and hope that I see her go to the bathroom, 'cause if not, I'm going to take her to emergency tomorrow to get a scan and make sure she's not clogged up because of colon cancer again.
I really don't want this to be true, so I'm going to pray and hope to God that she is doing well and nothing is wrong.
:(
And what's funny is, speaking of God, that within the last 2 days, I've made a movement at my school to sponsor a non-profit organization's mission to Haiti for Christmas. I'm talking about getting fraternities and pre-med associations on board with donations, toy drives, raffle incentives and other things to try and raise money for Haiti so that the kids can enjoy a better Christmas, and so that the organization can expand the school that's already built there in order to help the kids out to go to school and get an education. It's really sad that after so many years of the earthquake, Haiti is still suffering and will probably continue to suffer for many more years to come. Devastation is not an easy thing to come out of, but it can get better with help, so I'm hoping for a huge turn out in this charity event.
I managed to get my physics and chemistry homework done, as well as my biology notes finished. I just need to finish reading the last 3 chapters and starting on notecards and probably finishing them tonight.
Tomorrow, I need to take Max out for a walk in the morning because I promised him, head to Macy's to look for an outfit for my mom, then my sister is coming over at 1, in which I'll do some laundry and chitchat with her about the wedding, and around 3 probably start my pre-calc homework and finish studying for my bio exam, and then at 6pm, I have to head to school to do an extra credit video for Chemistry to raise my grade...
I just have way too many things to do honestly.
And I'm really hoping that my grandmother is okay
:(
I trust in you God, that you know what is best.
<3
Well, I'm having issues once again with my grandmother and her lies. She told my mom she hadn't gone to the bathroom in 3 days, so my mom confronted her about it and my grandma said it'd because she stopped taking her pills. My mom got upset and told me to talk to her, and when I did, she said that she did stop taking the pills, but she'd gone to the bathroom yesterday and today. My whole problem with this is that I don't know if she's lying or not. She could be telling me that just so I don't worry, or my mom doesn't worry, and in reality she HASN'T gone to the bathroom, meaning she might have cancer again, or she's telling the truth and there isn't any to worry about.
The only thing I can do is monitor her for the next day and hope that I see her go to the bathroom, 'cause if not, I'm going to take her to emergency tomorrow to get a scan and make sure she's not clogged up because of colon cancer again.
I really don't want this to be true, so I'm going to pray and hope to God that she is doing well and nothing is wrong.
:(
And what's funny is, speaking of God, that within the last 2 days, I've made a movement at my school to sponsor a non-profit organization's mission to Haiti for Christmas. I'm talking about getting fraternities and pre-med associations on board with donations, toy drives, raffle incentives and other things to try and raise money for Haiti so that the kids can enjoy a better Christmas, and so that the organization can expand the school that's already built there in order to help the kids out to go to school and get an education. It's really sad that after so many years of the earthquake, Haiti is still suffering and will probably continue to suffer for many more years to come. Devastation is not an easy thing to come out of, but it can get better with help, so I'm hoping for a huge turn out in this charity event.
I managed to get my physics and chemistry homework done, as well as my biology notes finished. I just need to finish reading the last 3 chapters and starting on notecards and probably finishing them tonight.
Tomorrow, I need to take Max out for a walk in the morning because I promised him, head to Macy's to look for an outfit for my mom, then my sister is coming over at 1, in which I'll do some laundry and chitchat with her about the wedding, and around 3 probably start my pre-calc homework and finish studying for my bio exam, and then at 6pm, I have to head to school to do an extra credit video for Chemistry to raise my grade...
I just have way too many things to do honestly.
And I'm really hoping that my grandmother is okay
:(
I trust in you God, that you know what is best.
<3
Friday, October 22, 2010
AHHHHH
I honestly feel so overwhelmed this weekend, I don't know where to start.
First of all, it's Friday. I should be saying this like "ITS FINALLY FRIDAY!" but unfortunately for me, it's just a continuation of the week. I have so many things to do, and I know it's going to take up probably most of my time this weekend to the point where I'll only have time to sleep and maybe go and take my dog out for a walk on Sunday.
Let's see, I have...
Bio lab report (which I'm going to do now)
2 Physics assignements... due by Sunday
1 Chemistry assignment.. due by Sunday
A bio exam to study for on monday
Precalc homework
A precalc exam on thursday
A physics exam the following monday
A bio quiz...due by tuesday
Research proposals to look up on...
Helping out to organize a Haiti relief fund/donation drive at school...
I swear, it's just too much. I'm going to focus as much as I can, even though what I really want to do is take a nap... but I'll get my butt in gear if I want to be able to go out tonight.
So i guess it's shower time for me, then bio lab report and finishing my notes for myself for bio exam!!
Ugh
-.-
First of all, it's Friday. I should be saying this like "ITS FINALLY FRIDAY!" but unfortunately for me, it's just a continuation of the week. I have so many things to do, and I know it's going to take up probably most of my time this weekend to the point where I'll only have time to sleep and maybe go and take my dog out for a walk on Sunday.
Let's see, I have...
Bio lab report (which I'm going to do now)
2 Physics assignements... due by Sunday
1 Chemistry assignment.. due by Sunday
A bio exam to study for on monday
Precalc homework
A precalc exam on thursday
A physics exam the following monday
A bio quiz...due by tuesday
Research proposals to look up on...
Helping out to organize a Haiti relief fund/donation drive at school...
I swear, it's just too much. I'm going to focus as much as I can, even though what I really want to do is take a nap... but I'll get my butt in gear if I want to be able to go out tonight.
So i guess it's shower time for me, then bio lab report and finishing my notes for myself for bio exam!!
Ugh
-.-
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
What a mess
Ugh.
So frustrated right now.
My chemistry test yesterday was a complete bomb. I studied for endless hours on that thing... I'm talking about made a review for myself over the weekend, then did practice problems from the book, plus old quizzes and mastering chemistry, and in the last 7 hours before the test, dedicated myself full throttle to doing the practice exams that were posted up with some fellow classmates.
I felt like I could get a B, possibly even an A. I could maybe turn around my luck and get an A in the class over all and maybe raise my GPA just a tad bit!
And then I got to the test... and took it... and knew I failed miserably... and cried and bawled and bitched and now I'm still bitching, but I guess I'll get over it soon.
It's just upsetting that I dedicated so much time to studying for that test, even going so far as neglecting some of my other classes in order to get an excellent grade on it, and ended up failing. Not even a 50, a 47.
How pathetic.
But you know what, I'm going to focus all of this energy into acing my Bio test and doing really well on my pre-calc test next week. If I fail at one thing, I can excel in another at least.
Balance out my emotions.
This weekend really sucks... I'm excited for Friday and going out with the girls.. I haven't done that in a really long time. But my boyfriend won't be here over the weekend, which means I'm not going to really give myself a break other than Friday night. I know myself... unless I'm going to hang out with someone, I won't care to give myself a break.
Great.
Good going, right?
And on top of that, I'm just a little nervous because I haven't gotten my period...
Ayyyy.
I'm not going to elaborate on that topic. I'm still not sure how I feel about it because I want to wait on it and make sure.
So I guess we'll see, right?
So frustrated right now.
My chemistry test yesterday was a complete bomb. I studied for endless hours on that thing... I'm talking about made a review for myself over the weekend, then did practice problems from the book, plus old quizzes and mastering chemistry, and in the last 7 hours before the test, dedicated myself full throttle to doing the practice exams that were posted up with some fellow classmates.
I felt like I could get a B, possibly even an A. I could maybe turn around my luck and get an A in the class over all and maybe raise my GPA just a tad bit!
And then I got to the test... and took it... and knew I failed miserably... and cried and bawled and bitched and now I'm still bitching, but I guess I'll get over it soon.
It's just upsetting that I dedicated so much time to studying for that test, even going so far as neglecting some of my other classes in order to get an excellent grade on it, and ended up failing. Not even a 50, a 47.
How pathetic.
But you know what, I'm going to focus all of this energy into acing my Bio test and doing really well on my pre-calc test next week. If I fail at one thing, I can excel in another at least.
Balance out my emotions.
This weekend really sucks... I'm excited for Friday and going out with the girls.. I haven't done that in a really long time. But my boyfriend won't be here over the weekend, which means I'm not going to really give myself a break other than Friday night. I know myself... unless I'm going to hang out with someone, I won't care to give myself a break.
Great.
Good going, right?
And on top of that, I'm just a little nervous because I haven't gotten my period...
Ayyyy.
I'm not going to elaborate on that topic. I'm still not sure how I feel about it because I want to wait on it and make sure.
So I guess we'll see, right?
Monday, October 18, 2010
Manic Monday's
How is everyone?
I'm particularly exhausted.
Went to bed last night around 3am, only to wake up at 7am to come to school for a full day of lecture until 8pm, and my day doesn't end there!! Have to continue studying for chemistry until about midnight tonight, wake up tomorrow by 9 (thank God, more than 6 hours of sleep), go meet with an old friend and chit chat, and then straight to school for another 6 hours of studying before pre-calc and then my exam.
And then...
I get to start studying for my bio and pre-calc exams next week.
Hooray!!
My agenda never ends -.-
And on top of that, my bf will be out of town, supervising a fieldtrip for his alma matter high school, so I won't really get to enjoy my weekend with breaks. Knowing myself, I'll perhaps hang out with my best friend on Friday, and spend the entire weekend studying. I'm thinking of taking my dog to the park maybe on Sunday, but I'm not sure yet... we'll see, I guess.
On the plus side, I did spend a nice weekend this weekend. Besides studying and making my own study guide for chem, and physics homework, and official bio lab reports, I got to go out and double date at Red Lobster with the boyfriend and a couple friend of ours on Saturday, and yesterday he came over all day to watch the football game, then play some PS3, and we even baked a cake together!! He was so proud of it... I appreciate him being so sweet lately. I know I haven't been in the best of moods between family matters and endless studying, but he continues to try and make me happy, so I'm thankful.
Anywho, better get back to reading. My class starts in 45 minutes and I wanted to get at least a little ahead before lecture.
And then endless amounts of Chemistry.
-.-
I'll leave you with a picture of my snookums :)
He's gotten so big, huh? Still a couple more months to grow! Mommy loves you!!
Here he is with his newly bought football jersey that daddy got him yesterday on a little shopping spree to pet toy land :)
I'm particularly exhausted.
Went to bed last night around 3am, only to wake up at 7am to come to school for a full day of lecture until 8pm, and my day doesn't end there!! Have to continue studying for chemistry until about midnight tonight, wake up tomorrow by 9 (thank God, more than 6 hours of sleep), go meet with an old friend and chit chat, and then straight to school for another 6 hours of studying before pre-calc and then my exam.
And then...
I get to start studying for my bio and pre-calc exams next week.
Hooray!!
My agenda never ends -.-
And on top of that, my bf will be out of town, supervising a fieldtrip for his alma matter high school, so I won't really get to enjoy my weekend with breaks. Knowing myself, I'll perhaps hang out with my best friend on Friday, and spend the entire weekend studying. I'm thinking of taking my dog to the park maybe on Sunday, but I'm not sure yet... we'll see, I guess.
On the plus side, I did spend a nice weekend this weekend. Besides studying and making my own study guide for chem, and physics homework, and official bio lab reports, I got to go out and double date at Red Lobster with the boyfriend and a couple friend of ours on Saturday, and yesterday he came over all day to watch the football game, then play some PS3, and we even baked a cake together!! He was so proud of it... I appreciate him being so sweet lately. I know I haven't been in the best of moods between family matters and endless studying, but he continues to try and make me happy, so I'm thankful.
Anywho, better get back to reading. My class starts in 45 minutes and I wanted to get at least a little ahead before lecture.
And then endless amounts of Chemistry.
-.-
I'll leave you with a picture of my snookums :)
He's gotten so big, huh? Still a couple more months to grow! Mommy loves you!!
Here he is with his newly bought football jersey that daddy got him yesterday on a little shopping spree to pet toy land :)
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Chemistry galore!!
It is a Saturday morning and I am currently studying.
Last night, I was home by 9:30pm.
Explain to me how a college student who should be out partying on the weekends has this kind of schedule, lol. I know, I know, the studious kind, and the one that graduates on time, but damn, sometimes it sucks.
-.-
At least I know I'm halfway through the semester and if I keep this up, I could possibly get A's and B's in all my classes, with the exception of physics... but I'll be happy if I get a C in that class, seeing as how it's so damn difficult -.-
So far, I have...
A - Bio Lab
A - Bio Lecture
A - Chem lab
B- Chem lecture (which I'm hoping to push up to an A now with this next exam).
A - Physics lab (so much better than the lecture)
C - Physics lecture
C - Precalculus (don't ask me how this has happened... I used to be extremely good at precalculus.. hopefully it improves).
So I'm looking to getting that chem lecture grade up to an A, and my precalc grade up to a B... I should be good by then. Either way, I'm not trying to make it into medical school, but I do need to maintain an overall 3.0 GPA, and unfortunately, C's drop your GPA very fast. :( College is unfair sometimes.
But anyway, better get back to studying. I'm actually thinking of going to pick up some chai or something to drink at my old store after taking a shower, and then beginning my review, but I'm not sure yet... maybe I'll just shower.
Wish me luck!!
Last night, I was home by 9:30pm.
Explain to me how a college student who should be out partying on the weekends has this kind of schedule, lol. I know, I know, the studious kind, and the one that graduates on time, but damn, sometimes it sucks.
-.-
At least I know I'm halfway through the semester and if I keep this up, I could possibly get A's and B's in all my classes, with the exception of physics... but I'll be happy if I get a C in that class, seeing as how it's so damn difficult -.-
So far, I have...
A - Bio Lab
A - Bio Lecture
A - Chem lab
B- Chem lecture (which I'm hoping to push up to an A now with this next exam).
A - Physics lab (so much better than the lecture)
C - Physics lecture
C - Precalculus (don't ask me how this has happened... I used to be extremely good at precalculus.. hopefully it improves).
So I'm looking to getting that chem lecture grade up to an A, and my precalc grade up to a B... I should be good by then. Either way, I'm not trying to make it into medical school, but I do need to maintain an overall 3.0 GPA, and unfortunately, C's drop your GPA very fast. :( College is unfair sometimes.
But anyway, better get back to studying. I'm actually thinking of going to pick up some chai or something to drink at my old store after taking a shower, and then beginning my review, but I'm not sure yet... maybe I'll just shower.
Wish me luck!!
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Midnight
As usual, my night owl self is pretty wide awake and it's just midnight.
Yep, just.
I guess that's what happens to you when you take 17 credits and do research, making learning your life long 24/7 job lol. Funny enough, I only had one chai today, compared to the 2-3 I usually drink. But I'm getting to bed just a little earlier today so that I can wake up early and head to school to do some studying. I have a quiz in math tomorrow that could potentially raise me up one letter grade, so I want to make sure I get the full credit for that. I unfortunately need it :(
I did manage to get an 85 on my bio lab midterm however (without studying) and have been getting 100's on all my quizzes in every other subject, so I'm doing pretty well for myself. I have a chem exam next Tuesday which I've been studying for since Monday (hopefully will make an improvement in my score and I'll get a high B or possible low A this time), and then I also have my research presentation tomorrow at 3:30 to my research panel. It was my first powerpoint ever made, and also my first presentation, so hopefully it goes well. Better to fail at a small scale than a large one, right?
Well, let me go take out Max and it's off to bed for me!! I'm thinking breakfast at Subway tomorrow... yeah? Or maybe Einstein Bagels... yum <3
Goodnight!!
Yep, just.
I guess that's what happens to you when you take 17 credits and do research, making learning your life long 24/7 job lol. Funny enough, I only had one chai today, compared to the 2-3 I usually drink. But I'm getting to bed just a little earlier today so that I can wake up early and head to school to do some studying. I have a quiz in math tomorrow that could potentially raise me up one letter grade, so I want to make sure I get the full credit for that. I unfortunately need it :(
I did manage to get an 85 on my bio lab midterm however (without studying) and have been getting 100's on all my quizzes in every other subject, so I'm doing pretty well for myself. I have a chem exam next Tuesday which I've been studying for since Monday (hopefully will make an improvement in my score and I'll get a high B or possible low A this time), and then I also have my research presentation tomorrow at 3:30 to my research panel. It was my first powerpoint ever made, and also my first presentation, so hopefully it goes well. Better to fail at a small scale than a large one, right?
Well, let me go take out Max and it's off to bed for me!! I'm thinking breakfast at Subway tomorrow... yeah? Or maybe Einstein Bagels... yum <3
Goodnight!!
Monday, October 11, 2010
iPs Presentation MADNESS!!
Hey everyone,
So once again it is Monday, and I have been diligently working away at my studies since 8am this morning. Actually, earlier, but it doesn't really count since most of the time was spent driving..
Anywho, the point is, this week is going to be exhausting. I have my stem cell research paper to present to the my research panel on Thursday, I have tons of chemistry homework to completely in addition to creating a study guide for next week's exam, and I also have all the regular readings and homeworks of all my classes piled into the lovely mound of work I need to finish.
Fun fun.
But I feel like I manage it as long as I keep on track. I've created goals for myself to finish things every day so that come Friday, I just need to review over the weekend and perhaps get ahead in some of my readings.
Oh yes, and I forgot my formal lab reports... those are always fun.
But at least I had a wonderful weekend with my boyfriend, celebrating our 3 year anniversary <3 I miss him lots, and know that this week I have to put my foot down on my heart and tell it to hush while I work away lol. But at least I have the memories to get me through those tough times, and maybe be able to squeeze in a quick kiss sometime in the middle of the week to keep my spirits high.
I love you baby!!
:)
<3
So once again it is Monday, and I have been diligently working away at my studies since 8am this morning. Actually, earlier, but it doesn't really count since most of the time was spent driving..
Anywho, the point is, this week is going to be exhausting. I have my stem cell research paper to present to the my research panel on Thursday, I have tons of chemistry homework to completely in addition to creating a study guide for next week's exam, and I also have all the regular readings and homeworks of all my classes piled into the lovely mound of work I need to finish.
Fun fun.
But I feel like I manage it as long as I keep on track. I've created goals for myself to finish things every day so that come Friday, I just need to review over the weekend and perhaps get ahead in some of my readings.
Oh yes, and I forgot my formal lab reports... those are always fun.
But at least I had a wonderful weekend with my boyfriend, celebrating our 3 year anniversary <3 I miss him lots, and know that this week I have to put my foot down on my heart and tell it to hush while I work away lol. But at least I have the memories to get me through those tough times, and maybe be able to squeeze in a quick kiss sometime in the middle of the week to keep my spirits high.
I love you baby!!
:)
<3
Friday, October 8, 2010
Anniversary
So it's my 3 year anniversary with the boyfriend today, and we decided to go to Kissimee, Florida last minute at 2 in the morning last night lol. We were searching fun places to go in Florida where we could get away for a weekend, and finally decided on there since it wasn't too long of a drive, and there's plenty to do there.
So I'm leaving in about an hour with him, and I'm very excited to get away. I need a break from my family... I get frustrated with them because they don't understand many things, and don't take the time to try to accommodate to who I am. In my family, you're supposed to do everything your parents say, including getting the career they think is right for you, getting the boyfriend they think is right for you, etc. And to an extent, I believe every family is like this, but latin families are just obsessed with the idea of having the perfect child and want to make every decision for you.
Unfortunately for them, I am now 20, and make my own decisions.
Not to say I don't take their advice into consideration.
But I think it's just time to move on from this era. I'm about a year away from graduating, and 3 years with the boyfriend.. I think I'm ready for that next step. And I believe he is too, it's just that our money situation is so horrible since I am going to school full time and not working... Hopefully I get into this RISE program next summer, in which I'll be able to work about 40 hours a week doing research, then 20 hours during school time, and balance the two. Save up some money... he can save up some money... and we can get married when we graduate.
But everything takes time, so we shall see.
For now, I'm going to enjoy my weekend and not complain, because I'm blessed to have a man like him in my life :)
<3
So I'm leaving in about an hour with him, and I'm very excited to get away. I need a break from my family... I get frustrated with them because they don't understand many things, and don't take the time to try to accommodate to who I am. In my family, you're supposed to do everything your parents say, including getting the career they think is right for you, getting the boyfriend they think is right for you, etc. And to an extent, I believe every family is like this, but latin families are just obsessed with the idea of having the perfect child and want to make every decision for you.
Unfortunately for them, I am now 20, and make my own decisions.
Not to say I don't take their advice into consideration.
But I think it's just time to move on from this era. I'm about a year away from graduating, and 3 years with the boyfriend.. I think I'm ready for that next step. And I believe he is too, it's just that our money situation is so horrible since I am going to school full time and not working... Hopefully I get into this RISE program next summer, in which I'll be able to work about 40 hours a week doing research, then 20 hours during school time, and balance the two. Save up some money... he can save up some money... and we can get married when we graduate.
But everything takes time, so we shall see.
For now, I'm going to enjoy my weekend and not complain, because I'm blessed to have a man like him in my life :)
<3
Monday, October 4, 2010
Must've woken up on the wrong side of the bed..
I'm just not feeling it today.
I got up, and my boyfriend picked me up from my house, and I got to school, and I'm just so... blah. I mean, I'm getting my things done at least (I only have extra credit for chemistry to complete and I'm done with my list for today... probably get started on my list for tomorrow tonight) but still... it's just not a good day for me I guess.
And it doesn't help that I haven't had my chai to wake me up... I think maybe that'll put me in brighter spirits.
Until I get to my 2 hour physics class -.-'
Oh lord. Please get me through the day.
Chai, where are you?
I got up, and my boyfriend picked me up from my house, and I got to school, and I'm just so... blah. I mean, I'm getting my things done at least (I only have extra credit for chemistry to complete and I'm done with my list for today... probably get started on my list for tomorrow tonight) but still... it's just not a good day for me I guess.
And it doesn't help that I haven't had my chai to wake me up... I think maybe that'll put me in brighter spirits.
Until I get to my 2 hour physics class -.-'
Oh lord. Please get me through the day.
Chai, where are you?
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Wonderful Weekend
Well, it's back to the slugger for me LOL.
Gotta get back on that daily grind after a wonderful birthday weekend... awesome Friday out with my friends and boyfriend, then a Saturday day in with my family... although that turned into more of an engagement celebration than my birthday celebration (my sister got engaged and decided to let everyone know on the day of my birthday... I was a little dissapointed because it became all about her, but I guess it happens to the best of us.. and I was very happy for her, so...) and then a night with my baby... and today, I went out with the boyfriend again and the dog, the sister-in-law, and her dogs to the doggy park. My baby (as in dog lol) absolutely loved it... he's so pooped he's laying on my bed right now asleep.
He never lays on my bed lol. That should tell you something.
But after such a successful weekend, it only follows that I should have a productive week ahead... especially when another weekend of celebration is coming up ahead. I'm making 3 years with my boyfriend (don't know if I told you this already, and if I did, there's a healthy reminder lol) so we are leaving for the weekend to some hotel on some beach... don't know which, don't know where. The point is to be together, relaxed, and away from everyone. I'm looking forward to it :)
So I gotta hop to all of my homework, and set up my presentation on stem cells for Parkinson's disease on Thursday... I have no idea how to make a Powerpoint, but I guess I will learn!!
Well, let's hop to it as of now, even though it's technically still the weekend lol. Better now than later!!
<3
Gotta get back on that daily grind after a wonderful birthday weekend... awesome Friday out with my friends and boyfriend, then a Saturday day in with my family... although that turned into more of an engagement celebration than my birthday celebration (my sister got engaged and decided to let everyone know on the day of my birthday... I was a little dissapointed because it became all about her, but I guess it happens to the best of us.. and I was very happy for her, so...) and then a night with my baby... and today, I went out with the boyfriend again and the dog, the sister-in-law, and her dogs to the doggy park. My baby (as in dog lol) absolutely loved it... he's so pooped he's laying on my bed right now asleep.
He never lays on my bed lol. That should tell you something.
But after such a successful weekend, it only follows that I should have a productive week ahead... especially when another weekend of celebration is coming up ahead. I'm making 3 years with my boyfriend (don't know if I told you this already, and if I did, there's a healthy reminder lol) so we are leaving for the weekend to some hotel on some beach... don't know which, don't know where. The point is to be together, relaxed, and away from everyone. I'm looking forward to it :)
So I gotta hop to all of my homework, and set up my presentation on stem cells for Parkinson's disease on Thursday... I have no idea how to make a Powerpoint, but I guess I will learn!!
Well, let's hop to it as of now, even though it's technically still the weekend lol. Better now than later!!
<3
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Nothing a good round of 12 hours of sleep can't cure.
I was feeling so crappy yesterday... endless rain (literally, non stop since the morning due to the tropical storm), a boundless amount of homework, and just too much work for one mind to take in. Usually I space out my studying through the week so that I finish everything by Sunday and can relax a little bit in between the week, but since my birthday is this Saturday, and I'm going out tomorrow night, I wanted to get everything done by tomorrow so that I wasn't too overwhelmed with anything to do this weekend..
In fact, I won't have anything to do!
As soon as I finish this pre-calc homework now and go to my research meeting...
But it is very mentally exhausting, to not give your brain a break in the week. I think I've found the most important thing to a college student.... Don't burn yourself out during the week just to have the weekend off, LOL!!
Well, I better get started. I only have about 50 problems to go, and then my research meeting at 3:30... we're going to be examining a branch of the stem cell as effective treatment for multiple pathologies, such as diabetes and parkinson's... it would be interesting to see if we can apply it to alzheimer's also.
Let's see how it goes.
<3
P.S. - I'll let you know how the crazy birthday weekend goes :)
I was feeling so crappy yesterday... endless rain (literally, non stop since the morning due to the tropical storm), a boundless amount of homework, and just too much work for one mind to take in. Usually I space out my studying through the week so that I finish everything by Sunday and can relax a little bit in between the week, but since my birthday is this Saturday, and I'm going out tomorrow night, I wanted to get everything done by tomorrow so that I wasn't too overwhelmed with anything to do this weekend..
In fact, I won't have anything to do!
As soon as I finish this pre-calc homework now and go to my research meeting...
But it is very mentally exhausting, to not give your brain a break in the week. I think I've found the most important thing to a college student.... Don't burn yourself out during the week just to have the weekend off, LOL!!
Well, I better get started. I only have about 50 problems to go, and then my research meeting at 3:30... we're going to be examining a branch of the stem cell as effective treatment for multiple pathologies, such as diabetes and parkinson's... it would be interesting to see if we can apply it to alzheimer's also.
Let's see how it goes.
<3
P.S. - I'll let you know how the crazy birthday weekend goes :)
Monday, September 27, 2010
Salads & Physics
Half way through the semester... finished chem exam #1 (B), bio exam #1(A), precalc exam #1(F....we'll pretend that didn't happen), and physics exam (today... most likely a C).
I am so anxious to take that thing... a 70 is a B, so I'm shooting for that, but I'm not so confident. I'm going to review the practice study guide he put up now before my bio lecture, and then again right before my exam time, but I'm not too hopeful.
I've learned to shoot for the low so that I can be relatively happy about my grade, instead of dissapointed that I didn't receive an A -.-.
Either way, my birthday is this Saturday, and then my 3 year anniversary with the boyfriend is next Friday, so I plan on having two amazing weekends (which means two very productive weeks) and hopefully I can relax for the most part.
Let me get going... still have to get my sweater before I settle down in the library to study.
See you soon.
<3
I am so anxious to take that thing... a 70 is a B, so I'm shooting for that, but I'm not so confident. I'm going to review the practice study guide he put up now before my bio lecture, and then again right before my exam time, but I'm not too hopeful.
I've learned to shoot for the low so that I can be relatively happy about my grade, instead of dissapointed that I didn't receive an A -.-.
Either way, my birthday is this Saturday, and then my 3 year anniversary with the boyfriend is next Friday, so I plan on having two amazing weekends (which means two very productive weeks) and hopefully I can relax for the most part.
Let me get going... still have to get my sweater before I settle down in the library to study.
See you soon.
<3
Monday, September 20, 2010
First Exam of Fall 10
Well, here we goooo.
I'm about an hour and a half away from my first science exam of the semester, and of many more to come over the next year and a half or so. It's Biology, and I've been reviewing pretty much since the beginning of the semester all of the material covered, so I believe I'll do reallly good today :)
In fact, I was just reviewing my flashcards and reading over the study guides I created for myself, and I've pretty much got everything down pact :)
So now I'm here, blogging, boredly, and wishing I had my venti nonfat no water chai latte to get me going through the exam and subsequent hours that're coming for my chemistry exam tomorrow... still have one chapter to create a study guide for, and then do practice problems. And tonight, I shall take a practice exam that he has posted, score myself, and whatever I scored low on, I can practice tomorrow before the exam. It's at 8:30 at night, so I've got plenty of time :)
Alrighty, well let me get going.
I think I'm going to play bubble pop.
:D
Oh, and my birthday is next Saturday!!!
And my mom is getting me a new phone and a desk to study for the extra room we now have (since it is no longer my sisters.. well, it hasn't been for years, but they finally made it official lol).
<3
I'm about an hour and a half away from my first science exam of the semester, and of many more to come over the next year and a half or so. It's Biology, and I've been reviewing pretty much since the beginning of the semester all of the material covered, so I believe I'll do reallly good today :)
In fact, I was just reviewing my flashcards and reading over the study guides I created for myself, and I've pretty much got everything down pact :)
So now I'm here, blogging, boredly, and wishing I had my venti nonfat no water chai latte to get me going through the exam and subsequent hours that're coming for my chemistry exam tomorrow... still have one chapter to create a study guide for, and then do practice problems. And tonight, I shall take a practice exam that he has posted, score myself, and whatever I scored low on, I can practice tomorrow before the exam. It's at 8:30 at night, so I've got plenty of time :)
Alrighty, well let me get going.
I think I'm going to play bubble pop.
:D
Oh, and my birthday is next Saturday!!!
And my mom is getting me a new phone and a desk to study for the extra room we now have (since it is no longer my sisters.. well, it hasn't been for years, but they finally made it official lol).
<3
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Hi at 1am
Hello fellow bloggers,
It is 1:19am and I am just finishing up my chemistry study guide.
On a Saturday night.
When it is typical party time.
But that's alright, 'cause I spent a nice little evening with my boyfriend yesterday, and pretty much all day with one of my old friends, so it works out well. And tomorrow I'm spending all day in the library sooo.... better to get some things done for this class, and less to do tomorrow, which means I get to come home earlier!!
And it also means I'm closer to receiving an A on my exam for both Bio and Chemistry.
Oh, and also, I'm going to go speak to the dean of biology to eliminate the requirement of physics for me, since I am not a premed and will not need the course in order to gain admission to the graduate school. It would help me immensly if I could just not worry about that class and hopefully have it removed. Although I think I'll have to finish out the semester :/
But let's see if he even fulfills my request.
Anywho, gonna get back to studying.
:)
It is 1:19am and I am just finishing up my chemistry study guide.
On a Saturday night.
When it is typical party time.
But that's alright, 'cause I spent a nice little evening with my boyfriend yesterday, and pretty much all day with one of my old friends, so it works out well. And tomorrow I'm spending all day in the library sooo.... better to get some things done for this class, and less to do tomorrow, which means I get to come home earlier!!
And it also means I'm closer to receiving an A on my exam for both Bio and Chemistry.
Oh, and also, I'm going to go speak to the dean of biology to eliminate the requirement of physics for me, since I am not a premed and will not need the course in order to gain admission to the graduate school. It would help me immensly if I could just not worry about that class and hopefully have it removed. Although I think I'll have to finish out the semester :/
But let's see if he even fulfills my request.
Anywho, gonna get back to studying.
:)
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Lab Time
Hey everyone,
So I'm here at my research lab currently, at my awesome personal desk, working on homework. I hate the amount of homework I have, but I'm trying to get it finished so that I can focus on studying for my upcoming bio and chemistry exams. I took my pre-calc exam on Tuesday, and I think today we might find out our exam grades.... I thought it was going to be easy, but something tells me I didn't do a very good job and I'm very nervous :(
On a brighter note, I'm finally done working for Starbucks. I got my shifts covered and I can now focus solely on school...which is an every day thing. I spend at least 2 hours every day, reviewing, making study guides, reading or just studying in general. And it seems like every week I have an exam, and every week I have tons of homework due, so my studying never stops. I was just in the library last night with my boyfriend studying... and it made me so happy, 'cause he was excited about school and managed to get through an entire chapter, do a quiz (and get 100%!!!) and finish most of his homework questions. This is a really big accomplishment for him since he's kind of ADD when it comes to school, lol, but he's moving forward and making soooo much progress. I'm very proud of him... love you baby!!
So yep.. just wanted to do a quick recap. I have to run my own DNA electrophoresis at some point today befor the meeting to discuss current neurobiology topics to get up to date with the professor and what research she wants us to do, but I think I've got it down pact. The whole gene that triggers cancer, specifically in the central nervous system, and knocking out that gene in mice to see if they are likely to develop the diseases or not, which indiciates the gene IS responsible for the expression of the cancer... very interesting stuff. I'm really liking this field of work, even though I like my infectious diseases as well... we'll see I guess.
Anywho, better get going. Gotta focus on some bio before I do some lab work.
Toodles!!
:)
So I'm here at my research lab currently, at my awesome personal desk, working on homework. I hate the amount of homework I have, but I'm trying to get it finished so that I can focus on studying for my upcoming bio and chemistry exams. I took my pre-calc exam on Tuesday, and I think today we might find out our exam grades.... I thought it was going to be easy, but something tells me I didn't do a very good job and I'm very nervous :(
On a brighter note, I'm finally done working for Starbucks. I got my shifts covered and I can now focus solely on school...which is an every day thing. I spend at least 2 hours every day, reviewing, making study guides, reading or just studying in general. And it seems like every week I have an exam, and every week I have tons of homework due, so my studying never stops. I was just in the library last night with my boyfriend studying... and it made me so happy, 'cause he was excited about school and managed to get through an entire chapter, do a quiz (and get 100%!!!) and finish most of his homework questions. This is a really big accomplishment for him since he's kind of ADD when it comes to school, lol, but he's moving forward and making soooo much progress. I'm very proud of him... love you baby!!
So yep.. just wanted to do a quick recap. I have to run my own DNA electrophoresis at some point today befor the meeting to discuss current neurobiology topics to get up to date with the professor and what research she wants us to do, but I think I've got it down pact. The whole gene that triggers cancer, specifically in the central nervous system, and knocking out that gene in mice to see if they are likely to develop the diseases or not, which indiciates the gene IS responsible for the expression of the cancer... very interesting stuff. I'm really liking this field of work, even though I like my infectious diseases as well... we'll see I guess.
Anywho, better get going. Gotta focus on some bio before I do some lab work.
Toodles!!
:)
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Physics Sucks
Ah well i found time to blog again.
My vacation was great... unfortunately, it cost me a lot of time that I could have used studying and catching up on work. So now I'm not only behind, I'm doubly behind.
I'm setting daily goals for myself though so I can at least catch up with this weeks work by Friday night, and then over the weekend read up for next week hopefully.
I honestly have so much on my plate that I can't spell it out for you like I did in my last blog. But i'm being optomistic that things will work out and I'll have time for everything.
I have do have wonderful news though...
I'M FINALLY QUITTING MY JOB!!!
Sad to go, boohoo, lots of tears... (yeah right).
I'm taking out a $4000 loan to be able to help myself pay my way until next summer through activities and my minimum credit card payment. I should be more than fine because I really only need $3200 but my mom told me to round it up. So tonight we are applying, of course with my father as my co-signer, so that his good credit gets me a low APR. And of course when I get paid to work in the lab next summer, I should be able to save some money up to make nice payments and pay it off VERY quickly (even though I don't have to start making a payment until 6 months after my graduation).
So positive on that side.
Now I can take weekends to actually sleep (and tuesdays and thursdays) instead of waking up at 4am to go open the store, and then to study without thinking that I have 6 hours to be wasted (well not really, I'm getting paid) that I could use to study for exams or to just catch up on homework.
My boyfriend is having surgery on Friday, and I'm kind of taking that as a positive for myself because it means I'll be at his house taking care of him (although he'll probably be sleeping most of the time) and be able to read and do homework without any interruptions. At the same time I'm worried for him and I'm sad because I know this is going to hurt him, lol... not something funny, but... idk why I laughed... scratch that... anyway, yeah, I'm sad for him :( I don't like to see him go through pain, but I know he's strong and he'll be fine, so... hoping for the best and a quick recovery from everything.
Let me get back to doing some review questions for biology on my ebook... Blog ya later!! (<-- haha, funny to me... corny to you probably... ok... leaving...)
:)
My vacation was great... unfortunately, it cost me a lot of time that I could have used studying and catching up on work. So now I'm not only behind, I'm doubly behind.
I'm setting daily goals for myself though so I can at least catch up with this weeks work by Friday night, and then over the weekend read up for next week hopefully.
I honestly have so much on my plate that I can't spell it out for you like I did in my last blog. But i'm being optomistic that things will work out and I'll have time for everything.
I have do have wonderful news though...
I'M FINALLY QUITTING MY JOB!!!
Sad to go, boohoo, lots of tears... (yeah right).
I'm taking out a $4000 loan to be able to help myself pay my way until next summer through activities and my minimum credit card payment. I should be more than fine because I really only need $3200 but my mom told me to round it up. So tonight we are applying, of course with my father as my co-signer, so that his good credit gets me a low APR. And of course when I get paid to work in the lab next summer, I should be able to save some money up to make nice payments and pay it off VERY quickly (even though I don't have to start making a payment until 6 months after my graduation).
So positive on that side.
Now I can take weekends to actually sleep (and tuesdays and thursdays) instead of waking up at 4am to go open the store, and then to study without thinking that I have 6 hours to be wasted (well not really, I'm getting paid) that I could use to study for exams or to just catch up on homework.
My boyfriend is having surgery on Friday, and I'm kind of taking that as a positive for myself because it means I'll be at his house taking care of him (although he'll probably be sleeping most of the time) and be able to read and do homework without any interruptions. At the same time I'm worried for him and I'm sad because I know this is going to hurt him, lol... not something funny, but... idk why I laughed... scratch that... anyway, yeah, I'm sad for him :( I don't like to see him go through pain, but I know he's strong and he'll be fine, so... hoping for the best and a quick recovery from everything.
Let me get back to doing some review questions for biology on my ebook... Blog ya later!! (<-- haha, funny to me... corny to you probably... ok... leaving...)
:)
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Wow, so I actually found time to update this.
Not really, I've squeezed in 5 minutes that I should be reading for biology to update... absolutely nobody about how I'm doing. In fact, this is probably just a way of me keeping sane and taking 5 minutes to myself, although albeit, I'll probably just end up more stressed than what I am.
I feel completely overwhelmed. I have a biology chapter to read and a summary of the past 2 chapters to make in order to prepare a study guide for the coming test in 2 weeks. I have a chapter to finish for chemistry, homework on blackboard, and homework on MasteringChemistry, and if time allows, to continue on to the next chapter reading. I have to finish reading the physics chapter and do the MasteringPhysics homework (which usually takes a total of 3 hours for a couple of problems only). I have homework for precalc and a study guide to create for the exam that is next week if I'm not mistaken (and if we don't fall behind).
So breakdown of homework:
Biology:
-Finish Chapter 4
-Review previous chapters and note down important things for exam
-Begin study guide for exam
-Finish online question in connect for self improvement
Chemistry:
-Finish Chapter 2
-HW on blackboard
-HW on MasteringChemistry
Physics:
-Finish Chapter 2
-HW on MasteringPhysics
-Problems in book for personal improvement (and much needed study time)
Precalc:
-Finish HW Chapter 2 & 3
-Create study guide for exam next week
In other news, I managed to get a volunteer position as a research assistant in a neurobiology lab with a very amazing woman in my school. She has given me the opportunity where not many others have, and I intend to give her the best of my abilities and hard work to further her research. I know this is going to take up much of my remaining free time during the week (Tu/Thurs afternoons, after work and before my 6pm class), but it is something that will help my career for sure, and will also improve my resume for when I apply to the RISE program, to summer internships, and to graduate school eventually.
Work? Well, that's easy to sum up... I'm about 10% away from quitting... don't know how that makes mathematical sense, but it does in my head, so deal with it. I just don't think it's worth it anymore, but at the same time, I know I have to pay off that credit card and to save some money to go somewhere (to keep my sanity you know), so I'm staying for now, hoping for another job, hopefully as a paid lab assistant next semester.
Everything else? Going dandy. I miss my boyfriend often... today I got to see him, but more as a tutor and instructor for him in biology than as a girlfriend, so we don't really spend together time. :( I'm sad about that, and again I'm meeting with him tonight for the same purpose, but hopefully we'll have time to cuddle and snuggle sometime soon.... and science will not be running wild in my mind.
Actually, we're going to the keys this weekend with his friends so maybe that'll be some good time... somewhat together. My birthday and our anniversary are coming up so hopefully then too.
Anyway, let me get going. My chemistry class begins in 25 minutes and I plan on looking for the solutions manual to my physics book so I can do the practice problems on my own and improve in that damned class.
See you later.
Wish me lots of speed and intelligence, I'm going to need it.
And oh yeah, sleep.
Not really, I've squeezed in 5 minutes that I should be reading for biology to update... absolutely nobody about how I'm doing. In fact, this is probably just a way of me keeping sane and taking 5 minutes to myself, although albeit, I'll probably just end up more stressed than what I am.
I feel completely overwhelmed. I have a biology chapter to read and a summary of the past 2 chapters to make in order to prepare a study guide for the coming test in 2 weeks. I have a chapter to finish for chemistry, homework on blackboard, and homework on MasteringChemistry, and if time allows, to continue on to the next chapter reading. I have to finish reading the physics chapter and do the MasteringPhysics homework (which usually takes a total of 3 hours for a couple of problems only). I have homework for precalc and a study guide to create for the exam that is next week if I'm not mistaken (and if we don't fall behind).
So breakdown of homework:
Biology:
-Finish Chapter 4
-Review previous chapters and note down important things for exam
-Begin study guide for exam
-Finish online question in connect for self improvement
Chemistry:
-Finish Chapter 2
-HW on blackboard
-HW on MasteringChemistry
Physics:
-Finish Chapter 2
-HW on MasteringPhysics
-Problems in book for personal improvement (and much needed study time)
Precalc:
-Finish HW Chapter 2 & 3
-Create study guide for exam next week
In other news, I managed to get a volunteer position as a research assistant in a neurobiology lab with a very amazing woman in my school. She has given me the opportunity where not many others have, and I intend to give her the best of my abilities and hard work to further her research. I know this is going to take up much of my remaining free time during the week (Tu/Thurs afternoons, after work and before my 6pm class), but it is something that will help my career for sure, and will also improve my resume for when I apply to the RISE program, to summer internships, and to graduate school eventually.
Work? Well, that's easy to sum up... I'm about 10% away from quitting... don't know how that makes mathematical sense, but it does in my head, so deal with it. I just don't think it's worth it anymore, but at the same time, I know I have to pay off that credit card and to save some money to go somewhere (to keep my sanity you know), so I'm staying for now, hoping for another job, hopefully as a paid lab assistant next semester.
Everything else? Going dandy. I miss my boyfriend often... today I got to see him, but more as a tutor and instructor for him in biology than as a girlfriend, so we don't really spend together time. :( I'm sad about that, and again I'm meeting with him tonight for the same purpose, but hopefully we'll have time to cuddle and snuggle sometime soon.... and science will not be running wild in my mind.
Actually, we're going to the keys this weekend with his friends so maybe that'll be some good time... somewhat together. My birthday and our anniversary are coming up so hopefully then too.
Anyway, let me get going. My chemistry class begins in 25 minutes and I plan on looking for the solutions manual to my physics book so I can do the practice problems on my own and improve in that damned class.
See you later.
Wish me lots of speed and intelligence, I'm going to need it.
And oh yeah, sleep.
Monday, August 30, 2010
17 credits and 1 week later...
Ah well, I haven't posted since those eager days right before school started, and apparently I've missed a lot from the blogs I've followed... I'll have to catch up on them, but probably not anytime soon. I have way too many things going on in my own life for me to be interested in someone else's life at the moment.
That was summer time.
This is school time. Lol.
But anyway, a quick update on me since I haven't written in some time....
I am currently a week into school, and it has been hectic. I was slammed with homework from day one... already by Chapter 4 in my Biology class (thank god I'm taking it as an easy A because I know the material, otherwise I would have been overwhelmed) and several other assignments spanned out across my lectures and labs.
To say the least, I haven't had time to scratch my ass. I've either been working, helping my boyfriend / spending time with my boyfriend, showering, or, as per the majority of my daily minutes, reading up on class and doing homework, or sitting in a lecture or lab actually doing the work in person and not at home. It's been stressful... if you look at my planner, it is CHOCK FULL of color... from green (school time) to yellow (work time) to purple (study time) to pink (fun time), it just barely has any white space in it.
And I needn't tell you that the pink hardly appears on there.
But I'm managing to keep up with my assignments, and not finding anything toooo difficult. My Physics class is what's worrying me at the moment, especially because it's my first time taking it, and it involves some trig that I need to brush up on... but otherwise, it's not too bad. Biology is a breeze, Chemistry isn't proving too difficult (after the survey class I took last semester for nursing), PreCalc is alright... so everything seems to me managing.
Fortunate for me, I've managed to keep organized, which is why I'm on top of my assignments, even my labs. I'm always a step ahead and have read the material for the lecture that day. It's something that I find very useful... I spend less time with "?" that on my face, and more time with "!" that lol.
But yes... and as for everything else, it's great. Love my boyfriend, love my puppy, occasionally love my family (you know how that is) (I'm just kidding, I love them all the time), and want to quit work more than ever at the moment.... I have no patience for the stupidity of people who don't know the different between nonfat milk and whole milk, and I could honestly use those 15 hours I work to catch up on sleep and to do some extra problems for class... I mean, after all, I am taking 17 credits... But I also need the money. I have to keep a steady payment on that credit card I have, so I suppose I have to suck it up for now.
Unless of course another opportunity pops up, like the one available for the RISE scholars.
Which reminds me, they're having an open forum tomorrow and I'm going to go visit. How exciting!! I hope to get into that program and become a lab assistant... higher pay and more experience in my field?
HELL TO THE YES.
Alright, so let me get back to doing some extra credit for Chemistry (and extra problems for me), and then some flashcards before Bio lecture.
I'll try to update this when time allows me, and boredom pushes me towards it.
See yaaaaa.
That was summer time.
This is school time. Lol.
But anyway, a quick update on me since I haven't written in some time....
I am currently a week into school, and it has been hectic. I was slammed with homework from day one... already by Chapter 4 in my Biology class (thank god I'm taking it as an easy A because I know the material, otherwise I would have been overwhelmed) and several other assignments spanned out across my lectures and labs.
To say the least, I haven't had time to scratch my ass. I've either been working, helping my boyfriend / spending time with my boyfriend, showering, or, as per the majority of my daily minutes, reading up on class and doing homework, or sitting in a lecture or lab actually doing the work in person and not at home. It's been stressful... if you look at my planner, it is CHOCK FULL of color... from green (school time) to yellow (work time) to purple (study time) to pink (fun time), it just barely has any white space in it.
And I needn't tell you that the pink hardly appears on there.
But I'm managing to keep up with my assignments, and not finding anything toooo difficult. My Physics class is what's worrying me at the moment, especially because it's my first time taking it, and it involves some trig that I need to brush up on... but otherwise, it's not too bad. Biology is a breeze, Chemistry isn't proving too difficult (after the survey class I took last semester for nursing), PreCalc is alright... so everything seems to me managing.
Fortunate for me, I've managed to keep organized, which is why I'm on top of my assignments, even my labs. I'm always a step ahead and have read the material for the lecture that day. It's something that I find very useful... I spend less time with "?" that on my face, and more time with "!" that lol.
But yes... and as for everything else, it's great. Love my boyfriend, love my puppy, occasionally love my family (you know how that is) (I'm just kidding, I love them all the time), and want to quit work more than ever at the moment.... I have no patience for the stupidity of people who don't know the different between nonfat milk and whole milk, and I could honestly use those 15 hours I work to catch up on sleep and to do some extra problems for class... I mean, after all, I am taking 17 credits... But I also need the money. I have to keep a steady payment on that credit card I have, so I suppose I have to suck it up for now.
Unless of course another opportunity pops up, like the one available for the RISE scholars.
Which reminds me, they're having an open forum tomorrow and I'm going to go visit. How exciting!! I hope to get into that program and become a lab assistant... higher pay and more experience in my field?
HELL TO THE YES.
Alright, so let me get back to doing some extra credit for Chemistry (and extra problems for me), and then some flashcards before Bio lecture.
I'll try to update this when time allows me, and boredom pushes me towards it.
See yaaaaa.
Tuesday, August 10, 2010
Bioterrorism, Diseases, and Love
Hellooooooo.
Been a while since I actually wrote anything down, but I feel like that's how it's going to be really, especially now that school is going to start. I'm not going to have time to do anything, not even enjoy my growing baby boy anymore :( He's 50 pounds already, just reached 5 months 2 days ago. Growing boy.... growing VERY BIG boy. Here he is, just yesterday.
He's my pride and joy, and looovesss to go on car rides, as you can see. I guess I got him used to that though, since I declared him my boyfriend and I's baby, so I would drive him to my boyfriend at least once a week, usually twice. He never leaves my side (he's sleeping next to my bed at the moment and just finished "showering" with me) and begs to be taken when I leave the house... I try to oblige, but not when I go to work or have other things to do. He usually tags along though, for the trivial things like picking up some food for lunch or taking someone somewhere.
Anyway, school starts in 2 weeks. I'm extremely excited, yet very nervous. I've already pressured myself into getting straight A's or if not, I'm going to kill myself LOL. I'm nervous because I feel like this is something I really want to pursue, really want to do, and I need to get excellent grades if I have any hopes of continuing on. I'm hoping to assist a professor in their lab research this fall... I have an interview with the professor this Friday, to help and volunteer in her lab in the research process for cystic fibrosis. I'm hoping that this will help put me ahead of most other biology majors looking to pursue internships next summer, and in addition, give me a solid background to work off of on my resume when I apply to the job in the CDC once I graduate. I will hopefully be in the RISE program and be paid to assist in the laboratory next fall for a year, until my graduation.... of course, if everything goes according to plan.
Everything depends on those grades.
And then, on the other hand, I have my personal life creeping up on me. Incredible that I will be 20 in just 1 short month... I had my life all set up and planned to get married around 21/22, start having kids at 24, close the factory at 29... and I feel like life is just flying me by. Just 2 years ago, it seemed distant, and now it's looming ahead like an oncoming train with no intentions of stopping for anyone. I've discussed with my boyfriend about getting married and we have a plan... of course, getting married after receiving our Bachelor's, although I feel that we might get married before he finishes his. Unfortunately (and fortunately), he's a store manager, and works 40+ hours a week, so he has to go to school part time. I'm proud of him for being so diligent and to continue forward even when hardships have come his way, and he is a source of inspiration for me there.... to continue on through the battle, knowing that the war is yet to be won.
So... perhaps getting married in about 2 years, although he should pop the question soon? If I'm not mistaken, you're supposed to be engaged about a year in order to have enough preparation to plan everything.. we'll see, I guess, lol. I'm very excited to see what he does... despite all the arguments we might have and differences, I love him with all my heart and soul, and would never switch him for anyone else nor change anything about him.... ok, maybe his stubbornness at times, LOL.
But yes... and then there's the whole question about if I get the job in Atlanta, Georgia... are we going to move up together? Even if we're not married by then? Should I go to grad school first in Georgetown University in Washington, D.C. ? (which btw, has one of the most UNIQUE programs on bioterrorism and emerging infectious diseases as a masters program.... CAN YOU SAY EXCITED?!?!). Or should I work for a year and then go to grad school, hoping to find a job in D.C. with the government??? I'm not sure exactly where I'll end up, but I know the future holds many things in store, and I'm very excited for it... especially for the part where I get paid 81k straight out of school! :)
So... lots of things to think about. But as ever the important reminder, the present is what's here, not the future. So I'm going to make the best of it, strive for perfection, love all I can, and wait for the future with open arms.
:)
see you aoon.
Been a while since I actually wrote anything down, but I feel like that's how it's going to be really, especially now that school is going to start. I'm not going to have time to do anything, not even enjoy my growing baby boy anymore :( He's 50 pounds already, just reached 5 months 2 days ago. Growing boy.... growing VERY BIG boy. Here he is, just yesterday.
He's my pride and joy, and looovesss to go on car rides, as you can see. I guess I got him used to that though, since I declared him my boyfriend and I's baby, so I would drive him to my boyfriend at least once a week, usually twice. He never leaves my side (he's sleeping next to my bed at the moment and just finished "showering" with me) and begs to be taken when I leave the house... I try to oblige, but not when I go to work or have other things to do. He usually tags along though, for the trivial things like picking up some food for lunch or taking someone somewhere.
Anyway, school starts in 2 weeks. I'm extremely excited, yet very nervous. I've already pressured myself into getting straight A's or if not, I'm going to kill myself LOL. I'm nervous because I feel like this is something I really want to pursue, really want to do, and I need to get excellent grades if I have any hopes of continuing on. I'm hoping to assist a professor in their lab research this fall... I have an interview with the professor this Friday, to help and volunteer in her lab in the research process for cystic fibrosis. I'm hoping that this will help put me ahead of most other biology majors looking to pursue internships next summer, and in addition, give me a solid background to work off of on my resume when I apply to the job in the CDC once I graduate. I will hopefully be in the RISE program and be paid to assist in the laboratory next fall for a year, until my graduation.... of course, if everything goes according to plan.
Everything depends on those grades.
And then, on the other hand, I have my personal life creeping up on me. Incredible that I will be 20 in just 1 short month... I had my life all set up and planned to get married around 21/22, start having kids at 24, close the factory at 29... and I feel like life is just flying me by. Just 2 years ago, it seemed distant, and now it's looming ahead like an oncoming train with no intentions of stopping for anyone. I've discussed with my boyfriend about getting married and we have a plan... of course, getting married after receiving our Bachelor's, although I feel that we might get married before he finishes his. Unfortunately (and fortunately), he's a store manager, and works 40+ hours a week, so he has to go to school part time. I'm proud of him for being so diligent and to continue forward even when hardships have come his way, and he is a source of inspiration for me there.... to continue on through the battle, knowing that the war is yet to be won.
So... perhaps getting married in about 2 years, although he should pop the question soon? If I'm not mistaken, you're supposed to be engaged about a year in order to have enough preparation to plan everything.. we'll see, I guess, lol. I'm very excited to see what he does... despite all the arguments we might have and differences, I love him with all my heart and soul, and would never switch him for anyone else nor change anything about him.... ok, maybe his stubbornness at times, LOL.
But yes... and then there's the whole question about if I get the job in Atlanta, Georgia... are we going to move up together? Even if we're not married by then? Should I go to grad school first in Georgetown University in Washington, D.C. ? (which btw, has one of the most UNIQUE programs on bioterrorism and emerging infectious diseases as a masters program.... CAN YOU SAY EXCITED?!?!). Or should I work for a year and then go to grad school, hoping to find a job in D.C. with the government??? I'm not sure exactly where I'll end up, but I know the future holds many things in store, and I'm very excited for it... especially for the part where I get paid 81k straight out of school! :)
So... lots of things to think about. But as ever the important reminder, the present is what's here, not the future. So I'm going to make the best of it, strive for perfection, love all I can, and wait for the future with open arms.
:)
see you aoon.
Saturday, August 7, 2010
If You Forget Me
I found this poem and am in love with it... enjoy.
If You Forget Me
I want you to know
one thing.
You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.
Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.
If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.
If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.
But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine.
Pablo Neruda
If You Forget Me
I want you to know
one thing.
You know how this is:
if I look
at the crystal moon, at the red branch
of the slow autumn at my window,
if I touch
near the fire
the impalpable ash
or the wrinkled body of the log,
everything carries me to you,
as if everything that exists,
aromas, light, metals,
were little boats
that sail
toward those isles of yours that wait for me.
Well, now,
if little by little you stop loving me
I shall stop loving you little by little.
If suddenly
you forget me
do not look for me,
for I shall already have forgotten you.
If you think it long and mad,
the wind of banners
that passes through my life,
and you decide
to leave me at the shore
of the heart where I have roots,
remember
that on that day,
at that hour,
I shall lift my arms
and my roots will set off
to seek another land.
But
if each day,
each hour,
you feel that you are destined for me
with implacable sweetness,
if each day a flower
climbs up to your lips to seek me,
ah my love, ah my own,
in me all that fire is repeated,
in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten,
my love feeds on your love, beloved,
and as long as you live it will be in your arms
without leaving mine.
Pablo Neruda
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Commence Hell :)
Helloooo.
Wow, been a while since I posted.
Wellll... I'm back from my vacation finally (and sadly). I arrived on Thursday (it's currently Sunday) and I couldn't have had a better time... except for maybe some avoided fights and some awkward moments, but what can you do? It's human nature to quarrel. Either way, i really enjoyed my time sipping drinks, getting drunk, eating like a pig at buffets (and like a proper young lady at the gourmet restaurants at night), tanning, the beach and the pool, the amazingly nice people, and the excursions that we went on. I went swimming with the dolphins, something I highly recommend and loved and would do again. I also went horseback riding on the beach, which I've been wanting to do for quite some time... and it was nice because I got to go as fast as I wanted, so I cantered (not full galloped lol) on the beach next to the amazingly blue ocean, and I couldn't have felt more at home. I also went on this weird underwater thing that they put an oxygen mask on your head (sort of) and you go down to the base of the sea (not too far, maybe 20 feet) and walk the ocean floor... that was great. I wish I could do it all the time... I felt like the mermaid I should have been born as, lol.
So I definitely got to enjoy my favorite place in the world... the ocean. And I also got to enjoy time with my boyfriend and his family... we had our differences, but more often than not, were back to being absolutely romantic with each other and like we were first dating again (except we slept in the same bed at night lol!). It really was lovely... and it was even lovelier when he texted me the night we got back and told me he missed me and his bed was empty (go ahead and call me sappy, but it makes me happy to know he misses me just as much as I was missing him).
School is around the corner... I already signed up for my classes, and this semester, as well as next spring, are going to be absolute HELL for me.... but if I bust my ass for the next 9 months, I'm going to enjoy a much smoother last year of college to finish getting my BA in Biology and then see where I go from there. Here's my schedule for Fall:
Monday:
8am to 8pm I'll be in school... yes... a whole 12 FREAKING HOURS. I have max 2 hour breaks inbetween, but usually only an hour break inbetween my lectures and my labs.
Tuesday:
I'll be working anywhere from 4:30am to 3pm, and then I have class from 6:25 to 8:15.
Wends:
11am to 8pm in school... another hectic day, but at least I can sleep a bit more...
Thursday:
Same as Tuesday
Fri:
Same as Wends, except I get out at 5pm instead of 8pm...
And keep in mind that me and my boyfriend are beginning a workout regime, so I'll be hitting the gym from 9pm to 10pm Monday through Thursday nights... so FML. I'll be in shape, but I'm going to be exhausted... especially Monday's since my day begins at 7am (to get up and get ready) and doesn't end until 10pm at the gym... (and even then, I have to come home, shower, and study if possible).
Soo... it might be hectic, but I'm actually looking forward to school. It's not going to be easy... I'll be taking Biology, Chemistry, Physics, and Pre-Calculus... but I am confident that I can pull through. And if I can get excellent grades this semester, I'll be sure to ace Spring semester, since it's the same classes, just the second half (and harder) version of the ones I'll be taking now, with the exception of Pre-Calc, in which I'll be entering Calc 1.
So there's an update of my life... unfortunately I'm still working at the Bux, and will be for a long time until I manage to get my job as a research lab assistant I suppose... but at least it's a job, even if I do have to wake my ass up at 4am to go serve coffee.... stupid corporate America and their early times.
-.-
Well, I'm going to go play with my baby... he's grown so big! 4 months, 40 pounds, and growing!! He's a Great Dane mixed with Lab, so he'll be a big boy!!
:)
Have fun, whatever youre doing in the world.
<3
Wow, been a while since I posted.
Wellll... I'm back from my vacation finally (and sadly). I arrived on Thursday (it's currently Sunday) and I couldn't have had a better time... except for maybe some avoided fights and some awkward moments, but what can you do? It's human nature to quarrel. Either way, i really enjoyed my time sipping drinks, getting drunk, eating like a pig at buffets (and like a proper young lady at the gourmet restaurants at night), tanning, the beach and the pool, the amazingly nice people, and the excursions that we went on. I went swimming with the dolphins, something I highly recommend and loved and would do again. I also went horseback riding on the beach, which I've been wanting to do for quite some time... and it was nice because I got to go as fast as I wanted, so I cantered (not full galloped lol) on the beach next to the amazingly blue ocean, and I couldn't have felt more at home. I also went on this weird underwater thing that they put an oxygen mask on your head (sort of) and you go down to the base of the sea (not too far, maybe 20 feet) and walk the ocean floor... that was great. I wish I could do it all the time... I felt like the mermaid I should have been born as, lol.
So I definitely got to enjoy my favorite place in the world... the ocean. And I also got to enjoy time with my boyfriend and his family... we had our differences, but more often than not, were back to being absolutely romantic with each other and like we were first dating again (except we slept in the same bed at night lol!). It really was lovely... and it was even lovelier when he texted me the night we got back and told me he missed me and his bed was empty (go ahead and call me sappy, but it makes me happy to know he misses me just as much as I was missing him).
School is around the corner... I already signed up for my classes, and this semester, as well as next spring, are going to be absolute HELL for me.... but if I bust my ass for the next 9 months, I'm going to enjoy a much smoother last year of college to finish getting my BA in Biology and then see where I go from there. Here's my schedule for Fall:
Monday:
8am to 8pm I'll be in school... yes... a whole 12 FREAKING HOURS. I have max 2 hour breaks inbetween, but usually only an hour break inbetween my lectures and my labs.
Tuesday:
I'll be working anywhere from 4:30am to 3pm, and then I have class from 6:25 to 8:15.
Wends:
11am to 8pm in school... another hectic day, but at least I can sleep a bit more...
Thursday:
Same as Tuesday
Fri:
Same as Wends, except I get out at 5pm instead of 8pm...
And keep in mind that me and my boyfriend are beginning a workout regime, so I'll be hitting the gym from 9pm to 10pm Monday through Thursday nights... so FML. I'll be in shape, but I'm going to be exhausted... especially Monday's since my day begins at 7am (to get up and get ready) and doesn't end until 10pm at the gym... (and even then, I have to come home, shower, and study if possible).
Soo... it might be hectic, but I'm actually looking forward to school. It's not going to be easy... I'll be taking Biology, Chemistry, Physics, and Pre-Calculus... but I am confident that I can pull through. And if I can get excellent grades this semester, I'll be sure to ace Spring semester, since it's the same classes, just the second half (and harder) version of the ones I'll be taking now, with the exception of Pre-Calc, in which I'll be entering Calc 1.
So there's an update of my life... unfortunately I'm still working at the Bux, and will be for a long time until I manage to get my job as a research lab assistant I suppose... but at least it's a job, even if I do have to wake my ass up at 4am to go serve coffee.... stupid corporate America and their early times.
-.-
Well, I'm going to go play with my baby... he's grown so big! 4 months, 40 pounds, and growing!! He's a Great Dane mixed with Lab, so he'll be a big boy!!
:)
Have fun, whatever youre doing in the world.
<3
Monday, July 12, 2010
Just a recap..
Hey everyone,
So today is actually a pretty good day for me. For once, I'm not upset, overly joyous, or morbid. I'm complacent, lol. I just finished putting a load in the drier and in the washing machine, after working in the morning and taking a nice nap. I went yesterday with my boyfriend and his friends to see the final game of the World Cup on South Beach... most interestning experience I've ever had... I enjoy partying, but good gracious, those people were crazy!! i was drenched in beer, sweating like a maniac, hot as hell, almost had a heat stroke, and had to avoid stepping on glass, but like my boyfriend said... it only comes around every 4 years, so I guess I had to enjoy it to the fullest!!
I'm currently waiting on an email from a prospective employer... had my interview last week, think it went great. I'll be a behavioral therapist, like my best friend Mel, if I happen to get the job, which I'm very excited for. It pays almost 2 dollars more than my current job at Sbux, and although I'll be working with autistic kids, it'll be so much better than working for adults who can't open their own packets of splenda. At my current job, there's an amazing amount of laziness. If I happen to get this job (being positive!), there will be (sometimes) willingness to learn, but at least I know it's kids and not adults... they don't always make their own decisions for the best, especially when they're kids. But from the stories I've heard, autistic kids are very eager to please, and just have so much energy... it will be refreshing to work for something new, for higher pay, and for a much more rewarding job than "10 SPLENDA LATTE, COMING RIGHT UP!'
Don't get my wrong, I love the people I work with at my job. My co-workers are amazing, and like a second family. My boss is like a second dad to me, I can tell him all my problems and he'll give me advice without speaking about it to anybody else... very confidential. And the rest of my co-workers are pretty good friends, one even pretty close that I usually go to when I'm having deep relationship problems... one who has taught me to have more faith in God, even in the good times... So I'm thankful for them. But the people I work FOR... not so much. It just amazes me the amount of laziness that adults exhibit, especially here in Miami. They want their sugar put in for them, and their latte's and frappucino's done in a matter of seconds when I've got a line of about 20 drinks and I'm spitting them out as fast as I can without ruining the quality of the drink. So... it's an exhausting job, albeit, sometimes rewarding. I do have a few special customers I see on a daily basis, who are just so sweet, and I go out of my way to have their drink ready for them before they get to the register, even if there are people in front, just because of how nice and exceptionally well mannered they are with me. It's nice to be treated like a person and not a slave, just because you're behind a bar and wearing a green apron.
Anywho, my parents are away in Tenn. and they took my beloved puppy with them... Max is growing so big, and his ears are standing already. The shelter made a huge mistake IDing him... he is most definitely about 75% mixture of Great Dane... we've had him for barely 2 months and he's grown like... on an exponential scale. It amazes me how quickly a puppy becomes an adult dog... I wonder if this is how I'll feel about my kids. I'm going to try my best to be a stay at home mom for the first 6 months at least... but yes, I miss my Maxy Waxy. And his daddy (my boyfriend) misses him terribly too. I used to take him at least twice a week to my boyfriend's house, and we both miss him very much. I can't wait till he gets back... in 3 more wretched weeks :(
On a brighter note, I leave on my vacation next wends!! Going to an all inclusive resort in Punta Cana... drinking, vegetating, tanning, and sex here and there :p Hahaha.. I know, you didn't have to know the last part. But anyway, I'm excited to go. I need to go get another bathing suit sometime this week, as well as a couple more dresses because the restaurants at night are fancy and require dresses, lol. I'm very very very excited.
:)
Well, gotta go check on my clothes. I shall write to you soon.
Take care.
So today is actually a pretty good day for me. For once, I'm not upset, overly joyous, or morbid. I'm complacent, lol. I just finished putting a load in the drier and in the washing machine, after working in the morning and taking a nice nap. I went yesterday with my boyfriend and his friends to see the final game of the World Cup on South Beach... most interestning experience I've ever had... I enjoy partying, but good gracious, those people were crazy!! i was drenched in beer, sweating like a maniac, hot as hell, almost had a heat stroke, and had to avoid stepping on glass, but like my boyfriend said... it only comes around every 4 years, so I guess I had to enjoy it to the fullest!!
I'm currently waiting on an email from a prospective employer... had my interview last week, think it went great. I'll be a behavioral therapist, like my best friend Mel, if I happen to get the job, which I'm very excited for. It pays almost 2 dollars more than my current job at Sbux, and although I'll be working with autistic kids, it'll be so much better than working for adults who can't open their own packets of splenda. At my current job, there's an amazing amount of laziness. If I happen to get this job (being positive!), there will be (sometimes) willingness to learn, but at least I know it's kids and not adults... they don't always make their own decisions for the best, especially when they're kids. But from the stories I've heard, autistic kids are very eager to please, and just have so much energy... it will be refreshing to work for something new, for higher pay, and for a much more rewarding job than "10 SPLENDA LATTE, COMING RIGHT UP!'
Don't get my wrong, I love the people I work with at my job. My co-workers are amazing, and like a second family. My boss is like a second dad to me, I can tell him all my problems and he'll give me advice without speaking about it to anybody else... very confidential. And the rest of my co-workers are pretty good friends, one even pretty close that I usually go to when I'm having deep relationship problems... one who has taught me to have more faith in God, even in the good times... So I'm thankful for them. But the people I work FOR... not so much. It just amazes me the amount of laziness that adults exhibit, especially here in Miami. They want their sugar put in for them, and their latte's and frappucino's done in a matter of seconds when I've got a line of about 20 drinks and I'm spitting them out as fast as I can without ruining the quality of the drink. So... it's an exhausting job, albeit, sometimes rewarding. I do have a few special customers I see on a daily basis, who are just so sweet, and I go out of my way to have their drink ready for them before they get to the register, even if there are people in front, just because of how nice and exceptionally well mannered they are with me. It's nice to be treated like a person and not a slave, just because you're behind a bar and wearing a green apron.
Anywho, my parents are away in Tenn. and they took my beloved puppy with them... Max is growing so big, and his ears are standing already. The shelter made a huge mistake IDing him... he is most definitely about 75% mixture of Great Dane... we've had him for barely 2 months and he's grown like... on an exponential scale. It amazes me how quickly a puppy becomes an adult dog... I wonder if this is how I'll feel about my kids. I'm going to try my best to be a stay at home mom for the first 6 months at least... but yes, I miss my Maxy Waxy. And his daddy (my boyfriend) misses him terribly too. I used to take him at least twice a week to my boyfriend's house, and we both miss him very much. I can't wait till he gets back... in 3 more wretched weeks :(
On a brighter note, I leave on my vacation next wends!! Going to an all inclusive resort in Punta Cana... drinking, vegetating, tanning, and sex here and there :p Hahaha.. I know, you didn't have to know the last part. But anyway, I'm excited to go. I need to go get another bathing suit sometime this week, as well as a couple more dresses because the restaurants at night are fancy and require dresses, lol. I'm very very very excited.
:)
Well, gotta go check on my clothes. I shall write to you soon.
Take care.
Friday, July 2, 2010
Been a While
Ahh... it's been some time since I've written on here. Not like anybody cares, I don't have any followers... I think I have 1, maybe? And they probably subscribe to plenty as it is already, so, as always, this post is more for me than for anyone else.
How can I explain that I am tired of the same crap happening in my life?
I'm tired of being lied to, I'm tired of being taken for granted, I'm tired of being disrespected, I'm tired of my job...
I need such a huge change of scenery... sometimes I wonder if transferring far away to another school is a good idea, despite the debt I'll get in. I know that it's only running away from my problems, but really... I think it would be a relief for me. I think maybe I'll do a foreign exchange program, where I can get away for a semester and not have to deal with the lies, deceit and just plain bullshit, and I'll come back much revived, and maybe even inspired to move on with my life?
Honestly, I don't know how I swallow so much bullshit. I sit back and think to myself that sometimes I'm a bit too soft.... I get angry, then I think of God's forgiveness, try to implement that in myself and to be a better person, and to either forgive the opposing party, or, if it's the case that I'm correct and they're wrong (but they won't budge) to set my pride aside and to apologize for something that I haven't even done.
I really wish sometimes that people would put down THEIR pride and apologize for the mistakes that they have made. I'm so tired of putting myself under others, that I think years of repressed anger are starting to come out, and it's not pretty. Whether it's finally snapping back at my mother after she's nagged me for the hundredth time about something and setting her in her place (and OF COURSE, later apologizing for it), or snapping at my boyfriend for anger management that he can't seem to hold down, or customers at my job for being such idiots that they can't open their own damn packets of splenda (I'm not your bitch, just serving your coffee),....
I think i need my vacation.
Asap.
Pronto.
NOW.
How can I explain that I am tired of the same crap happening in my life?
I'm tired of being lied to, I'm tired of being taken for granted, I'm tired of being disrespected, I'm tired of my job...
I need such a huge change of scenery... sometimes I wonder if transferring far away to another school is a good idea, despite the debt I'll get in. I know that it's only running away from my problems, but really... I think it would be a relief for me. I think maybe I'll do a foreign exchange program, where I can get away for a semester and not have to deal with the lies, deceit and just plain bullshit, and I'll come back much revived, and maybe even inspired to move on with my life?
Honestly, I don't know how I swallow so much bullshit. I sit back and think to myself that sometimes I'm a bit too soft.... I get angry, then I think of God's forgiveness, try to implement that in myself and to be a better person, and to either forgive the opposing party, or, if it's the case that I'm correct and they're wrong (but they won't budge) to set my pride aside and to apologize for something that I haven't even done.
I really wish sometimes that people would put down THEIR pride and apologize for the mistakes that they have made. I'm so tired of putting myself under others, that I think years of repressed anger are starting to come out, and it's not pretty. Whether it's finally snapping back at my mother after she's nagged me for the hundredth time about something and setting her in her place (and OF COURSE, later apologizing for it), or snapping at my boyfriend for anger management that he can't seem to hold down, or customers at my job for being such idiots that they can't open their own damn packets of splenda (I'm not your bitch, just serving your coffee),....
I think i need my vacation.
Asap.
Pronto.
NOW.
Monday, June 7, 2010
Lonely
Ok, so this blog today is more about a lot of questions than wanting to vent anything.. I feel lost and confused and lonely, and yet, as lonely as I feel, I just want to be alone and I don't know why. I'm gonna meet up with my friend and have a conversation with him tonight about everything that's going on, but as usual, I just feeling like crying and I'm not sure why. I don't know if I'm moving from one stage into another in my life, or if I'm just confused where I'm standing and need a little shove in the right direction. I know that the decisions I've made have led me to where I am right now, and that God has no fault in this at all, because He is a God of free will, but at the same time, I can't help but want a little guidance right now, especially in my... well, nowhere in general, just life itself.
I sort of broke up with my boyfriend, once again, as always happens, but this time, I don't find myself running back to him constantly to ask him why, and to get back with me, and for us to just be happy again. That I want to be happy with him? Yes, with all my heart. With all my heart, i wish we could go back to those weeks right before, during and after Boston, where he was the biggest sweetheart of life and cherished and adored me every second of every day. He constantly texted me that he loved me, and he constantly reminded me that I was the girl of his dreams, and I was so utterly happy where I was... in a great relationship, happy to just exist and happy to just be with him. And then everything comes crumbling down because the past can never stay where it is meant to stay... the past. He was so happy with me, and went from happy to completely turned off the next day, and although we've seen each other and things have gotten better, I can't help but miss that perfect time we were having together and wonder if it's going to come back. This has happened to me so many times already in the course of our relationship, and all because I could not be patient at the beginning, but for everything that I have done to reconcile what has happened and what I have done in the past, nothing ever makes it right. And I suppose that is how it should be... two wrongs don't make a right, and neither does a right make a wrong, right. But I don't believe that I should pay for my mistakes endlessly. I feel that when you try and try at something, there should be a point where you succeed, whether you attain your goal or not, and no matter what I do, I feel like a failure, and it hurts and it sucks and I wish it would just go away.
And then, it doesn't help that it seems like the world is against me lately. My parents... well, my dad doesn't say much, but my mom nags me endlessly about why he hasn't come over, and why he's doing this again, and why aren't we a normal couple, and why aren't we more like a serious couple who spend time with their family, and it frustrates me SO MUCH, because before my family comes in the picture, it's about the RELATIONSHIP. First and foremost, it is about me and him, and it just doesn't seem to happen like that. I wish I could move out so my mother wouldn't know what's going on, and I wouldn't be asked every weekend why my boyfriend isn't coming over and having to lie to say that he's working (although most of the time he is).
I just miss the normalcy that was finally developing after so much time of being awkward.
And I wonder sometimes, that if we are bound to make mistakes, are we forever bound to the reprimands that come from them? Or is there a chance at being in the right, of learning your lesson and continuing with your life and being happier than before, when the mistake is hardly a crime at all?
Just food for thought.
:(
I sort of broke up with my boyfriend, once again, as always happens, but this time, I don't find myself running back to him constantly to ask him why, and to get back with me, and for us to just be happy again. That I want to be happy with him? Yes, with all my heart. With all my heart, i wish we could go back to those weeks right before, during and after Boston, where he was the biggest sweetheart of life and cherished and adored me every second of every day. He constantly texted me that he loved me, and he constantly reminded me that I was the girl of his dreams, and I was so utterly happy where I was... in a great relationship, happy to just exist and happy to just be with him. And then everything comes crumbling down because the past can never stay where it is meant to stay... the past. He was so happy with me, and went from happy to completely turned off the next day, and although we've seen each other and things have gotten better, I can't help but miss that perfect time we were having together and wonder if it's going to come back. This has happened to me so many times already in the course of our relationship, and all because I could not be patient at the beginning, but for everything that I have done to reconcile what has happened and what I have done in the past, nothing ever makes it right. And I suppose that is how it should be... two wrongs don't make a right, and neither does a right make a wrong, right. But I don't believe that I should pay for my mistakes endlessly. I feel that when you try and try at something, there should be a point where you succeed, whether you attain your goal or not, and no matter what I do, I feel like a failure, and it hurts and it sucks and I wish it would just go away.
And then, it doesn't help that it seems like the world is against me lately. My parents... well, my dad doesn't say much, but my mom nags me endlessly about why he hasn't come over, and why he's doing this again, and why aren't we a normal couple, and why aren't we more like a serious couple who spend time with their family, and it frustrates me SO MUCH, because before my family comes in the picture, it's about the RELATIONSHIP. First and foremost, it is about me and him, and it just doesn't seem to happen like that. I wish I could move out so my mother wouldn't know what's going on, and I wouldn't be asked every weekend why my boyfriend isn't coming over and having to lie to say that he's working (although most of the time he is).
I just miss the normalcy that was finally developing after so much time of being awkward.
And I wonder sometimes, that if we are bound to make mistakes, are we forever bound to the reprimands that come from them? Or is there a chance at being in the right, of learning your lesson and continuing with your life and being happier than before, when the mistake is hardly a crime at all?
Just food for thought.
:(
Thursday, June 3, 2010
Going Crazy
Ahhhh.
It's been a while since I've blogged, and I think that it's time that I should regularly start doing so again.
I'm so frustrated with life. I don't know in which direction I'm headed anymore, and could honestly knock on life's door and not know that what's on the other side is meant for me.
I know that I'm a dramatic person, and in retrospect of my blogs and of my actions these past couple of years, I've grown a lot. But I'm never going to be perfect, and this I've come to accept. Instead, I work towards the next attainable goal and am happy when I reach it and set my next goal that is not far off. I have belief in the things in which I wish to persevere, yet other people do not. And it makes me so mad that the world has turned some people's hearts into stone.
Me and my boyfriend may have a lot of problems, and we may have broken up for the moment, but we did it for the best intentions and to better ourselves in the long run because we understand that our relationship needs time apart, that we rushed into things a little too fast, and that we are unhappy where we are. I choose to tell a very select amount of people about these things, and some I don't, and it just frustrates me so much that some people are so negative about things.
"But you know, everything isn't always a fairytale. It's not going to end up the way you thought it would.... You guys fight too much, it's not meant to be..." and all this crap... how do YOU know? Are you in my shoes? Are you physically living my life? Are you there when we're in eachother's arms and confessing that we love eachother despite the amount of hard headedness we might have, and the differences we may have? Are you there when we fight and then laugh about the stupidity of our fight and continue on with our day? Were you there when we took that amazing trip to Boston and had such a great time? I DON'T THINK SO. THEN SHUT YOUR MOUTH.
I refuse to ask for advice anymore, except from God. And I know that he may not answer me right away, and usually answers in riddles rather that in straight words or actions, but at least I can count on him being supportive of everything that goes on in my life.
I think I'm done.
I'm tired.
I want things back the way they used to be, yet I've accepted that they won't be that way for a while, and I'm upset about it and finally letting tears go over the matter, even though it's been going on for a month. But I know that he is there for me, nonetheless, calling me and texting me every day to see how I am doing and what's going on.
I wish I could keep my weaknesses to myself, but sometimes I feel like I'm alone, and it just fucking sucks.
:(
This weather is making me depressed. I think I'll blog tomorrow, and hopefully on a lighter note.
<3
It's been a while since I've blogged, and I think that it's time that I should regularly start doing so again.
I'm so frustrated with life. I don't know in which direction I'm headed anymore, and could honestly knock on life's door and not know that what's on the other side is meant for me.
I know that I'm a dramatic person, and in retrospect of my blogs and of my actions these past couple of years, I've grown a lot. But I'm never going to be perfect, and this I've come to accept. Instead, I work towards the next attainable goal and am happy when I reach it and set my next goal that is not far off. I have belief in the things in which I wish to persevere, yet other people do not. And it makes me so mad that the world has turned some people's hearts into stone.
Me and my boyfriend may have a lot of problems, and we may have broken up for the moment, but we did it for the best intentions and to better ourselves in the long run because we understand that our relationship needs time apart, that we rushed into things a little too fast, and that we are unhappy where we are. I choose to tell a very select amount of people about these things, and some I don't, and it just frustrates me so much that some people are so negative about things.
"But you know, everything isn't always a fairytale. It's not going to end up the way you thought it would.... You guys fight too much, it's not meant to be..." and all this crap... how do YOU know? Are you in my shoes? Are you physically living my life? Are you there when we're in eachother's arms and confessing that we love eachother despite the amount of hard headedness we might have, and the differences we may have? Are you there when we fight and then laugh about the stupidity of our fight and continue on with our day? Were you there when we took that amazing trip to Boston and had such a great time? I DON'T THINK SO. THEN SHUT YOUR MOUTH.
I refuse to ask for advice anymore, except from God. And I know that he may not answer me right away, and usually answers in riddles rather that in straight words or actions, but at least I can count on him being supportive of everything that goes on in my life.
I think I'm done.
I'm tired.
I want things back the way they used to be, yet I've accepted that they won't be that way for a while, and I'm upset about it and finally letting tears go over the matter, even though it's been going on for a month. But I know that he is there for me, nonetheless, calling me and texting me every day to see how I am doing and what's going on.
I wish I could keep my weaknesses to myself, but sometimes I feel like I'm alone, and it just fucking sucks.
:(
This weather is making me depressed. I think I'll blog tomorrow, and hopefully on a lighter note.
<3
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Learning Again
Ahh...
I haven't blogged in forever.
I'm still slightly upset about many things going on in my life, and a lot of questions to be answered, but I feel like it's time to stop looking for answers and just let time dictate where things will go. In fact, I've done this before but I had forgotten my lesson and now I am re-learning it all over again... I think that sometimes people DO need to re-learn lessons, because time, although helpful in promoting something beautiful, can also make you forget about important things.
Soooo
My verdict from all this is that I will let time go by and just enjoy it for now. If things work out, they work out. If they don't, then it wasn't meant to be. But I feel in my heart of hearts that they are, and if they are, they will come to be. I feel like I'm always racing towards an answer, always searching, never resting. Perhaps it is time to stop worrying so much and enjoy what I have, because you never know when it will be gone. It's time to enjoy the questions being asked instead of running around like a chicken with its head cut off, trying to find the answer, and why the answer is what it is, and why it can't be something else... So many endless possibilities, I think that's what I drive myself crazy over.
All of this came about from a quote of course, and I'd like to share it with you guys as my parting thought. Even though I will choose to have hope and will probably still be anxious about many things going on, I will also take a step back, breathe, and wait. Patience is a virtue, right?
"Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. An the point is to live everything. Live the questions" - Rainer Maria Rike
I haven't blogged in forever.
I'm still slightly upset about many things going on in my life, and a lot of questions to be answered, but I feel like it's time to stop looking for answers and just let time dictate where things will go. In fact, I've done this before but I had forgotten my lesson and now I am re-learning it all over again... I think that sometimes people DO need to re-learn lessons, because time, although helpful in promoting something beautiful, can also make you forget about important things.
Soooo
My verdict from all this is that I will let time go by and just enjoy it for now. If things work out, they work out. If they don't, then it wasn't meant to be. But I feel in my heart of hearts that they are, and if they are, they will come to be. I feel like I'm always racing towards an answer, always searching, never resting. Perhaps it is time to stop worrying so much and enjoy what I have, because you never know when it will be gone. It's time to enjoy the questions being asked instead of running around like a chicken with its head cut off, trying to find the answer, and why the answer is what it is, and why it can't be something else... So many endless possibilities, I think that's what I drive myself crazy over.
All of this came about from a quote of course, and I'd like to share it with you guys as my parting thought. Even though I will choose to have hope and will probably still be anxious about many things going on, I will also take a step back, breathe, and wait. Patience is a virtue, right?
"Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. An the point is to live everything. Live the questions" - Rainer Maria Rike
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
-.-
Life is crap right now.
That's all I have to say.
Except for my little Max <3
I'll blog at a better time when I'm not pessimistic.
That's all I have to say.
Except for my little Max <3
I'll blog at a better time when I'm not pessimistic.
Friday, May 14, 2010
Max :)
Well, here are a few pictures of the new addition to the family!! I think he's more about me than anyone else... he already follows me around, but he's so cute I just can't help but take a gazillion photos of him :)
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